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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Around the world, fewer languages are being spoken, and just a few are becoming more common. Is this a positive or negative development?

One
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 argument under debate concerns the issue of whether the decline of
languages
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pratically
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practically
 spoken yields beneficial
effcts
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effects
 on
society
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 as a whole. Even though some negative impacts are suggested by many,
this
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 argument will contend that
this
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 phenomenon is expected to result in immeasurably beneficial outcomes. Admittedly, the possibility of learning about cultural diversity can abate as more and more
languages
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 are forgotten. With the perspective that
lanugages
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languages
language
 each reflect on distinct characteristics of
cultures
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, historians tend to envision the general concepts of diverse
cultures
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 by means of
languages
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.
For example
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, once very unique
languages
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, including certain types of rarely spoken, regional dialects in South Korea, by no means survive, historians cannot refer to
such
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 minor descriptions as detailed illustrations of lifestyles of the lay
people
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 in
old
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the old
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 days. In order to research detailed
cultures
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 of
such
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 dismissed places, the spoken
languages
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 are the only vehicle for illustrating each
of
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apply
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cultures
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culture
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.
This
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 exemplifies
one
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 of the worrisome aspects of the phenomenon of dissipating
languages
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.
Nonetheless
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, the trend of uniting a plethora of
languages
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 brings a couple of benefits. First and foremost, more
people
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 are able to interact with
one
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 another without affording
high
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the high
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 costs of distinct
languages
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. Until recently, countless numbers
languages
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 served as barriers, making
people
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 in international
society
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 have difficulties in communicating. As clearly seen in the case of English, the language that has become
one
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 of the most globally used
languages
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,
people
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 coming from disparate
cultures
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 can share ideas,
facilitaing
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facilitating
 the process of worldwide
society
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 more efficiently without paying additional costs for various translations.
Furthermore
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, as diverse
languages
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 are united into an identical communication vehicle, a handful of problems that do not burst upon in certain nations steer international
soceity
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society
 into
more
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a more
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consturctive
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constructive
one
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.
For instance
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, in South Korea, since 2020 the idea of animalism has been introduced through
the
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apply
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articles written
by
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in
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 English. That was a novel concept for Korean
people
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, developing South Korea into
more
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a more
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 mature
society
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. In conclusion, the decrease
of
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in
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languages
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 can pose a challenge
on
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to
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 ways to study a variety of
cultures
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.
However
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, it is
more
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apply
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imperative to acknowledge that the phenomenon of converging into
single
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a single
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 language offers helpful outcomes in terms of economic and cultural
aspets
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aspects
assets
, outweighing the disadvantages.

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task achievement
Ensure your essay has a clear thesis statement in the introduction, directly addressing the essay question. This helps in making your stance unequivocal right from the start.
coherence cohesion
To improve coherence and cohesion, try to use a wider range of cohesive devices beyond simple connectors. Experiment with synonyms, antonyms, and paraphrasing to enhance the readability and flow of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Incorporate a variety of complex sentence structures to make your writing more engaging and to demonstrate a higher level of English proficiency.
task achievement
Expand your examples to fully support your arguments. Detailed examples not only strengthen your argument but also make your essay more informative and persuasive.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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