Nowadays, many young people are attracted to dangerous sports such as snowboarding or mountain biking. What makes these sports so attractive? What measures should be taken to minimize the risks?

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High-risk

sports

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are getting more and more popular these days among teenagers for various reasons.

While

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this

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is a good sign for young people to undertake exercise, they can get injured easily if they do not pay enough attention during the process.

Hence

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, some mitigation methodology should be introduced to minimise the risks of getting hurt. One of the reasons that young people love to engage in dangerous

sports

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activities

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as they bring them excitement. Risky physical

activities

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such

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as mountain biking and snowboarding are relatively more challenging than typical

sports

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like tennis and football. Being outstanding at these

sports

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essentially provides

themwith

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them with

asense

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a sense

sense

of accomplishment.

In addition

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, the location of these

sports

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is normally close to nature which provides them with a chance to enjoy the breathtaking view when they are riding on a bike.

However

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, these fun

activities

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come with a high level of risk. In order to mitigate the chances of life-threatening injury, certain measures can be introduced by the local government to reduce the risk levels. Providing area maps that indicate the location of different levels of trails is a good way.

For example

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, in one of the famous skiing locations in snowy mountains in Australia, the space is divided into different levels, the yellow trail order a small slope for beginners and the black trail is for advanced players. Participants can pick which suits them the best

according to

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their experience.

Furthermore

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, an induction session can

also

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be provided to get them familiar with the area before they undertake the activity. To summarise, teenagers are tempted to play dangerous

sports

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as it is thrilling and exciting. It

also

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allows them to explore the

natures

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nature

show examples

during the activity. In order for them to enjoy these fun

activities

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safely, serval measures can be undertaken

such

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as area maps and induction sessions.

jennygo64Wed Feb 14 2024

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Task Achievement

To improve your Task Achievement, ensure that you fully address all parts of the task. Your essay should include a more detailed analysis of why dangerous sports are attractive and provide specific, detailed examples of measures to minimize risks.

Task Achievement

Focus on developing your ideas more thoroughly. Each paragraph should contain one main idea, supported by detailed examples or explanations. This will help in making your argument more convincing.

Coherence and Cohesion

To enhance the Coherence and Cohesion of your essay, consider using a wider range of linking words and phrases to connect ideas more effectively. This includes transitions between paragraphs to ensure a smooth flow of ideas throughout the essay.

Coherence and Cohesion

Use a variety of sentence structures to make your writing more engaging and to demonstrate your language proficiency. While you have a good structure, incorporating complex sentence formations can elevate your score further.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

Introduction
Body paragraph 1 – Problems
Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

One of the first problems of the...
Another problem that needs to be considered...
A possible solution to this problem would be...
One immediate practical solution is to...

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

304 words

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Nowadays, many young people are attracted to dangerous sports such as snowboarding or mountain biking. What makes these sports so attractive? What measures should be taken to minimize the risks?

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Many museums charge for admission, while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweigh the disadvantages?

It has been argued that gift giving should not be encouraged, because money is often wasted on things that people do not like or want. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this?

Some people believe that violence on television and in computer games has it damaging effect on society others deny that these factors have any significant influence on people's behavior discuss views and give your opinions

Write an email to a manager hotel expressing a bad experience in a hotel. mention the following points: describe the details of the experience, ask for a compensation somehow and suggest recommendations to improve

Some people prefer to get up early in the morning and start the day’s work. Others prefer to get up later in the day and work until late at night. Which do you prefer? Use specific reasons and examples to support your choice