the most important of sience should be to improve people's live to what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement

the progress of education has increased so strangely in the
last
few decades, preventing many wrong behaviours be the effect of
this
progress in our
live
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lives
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. is it dangerous for
community
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the community
a community
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who did not study or can not study in schools to deal with new learning progress? I would argue that
,
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apply
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skill can help the vast majority of society in many aspects of their lives and in
this
assay
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essay
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,
i
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I
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will support my view.helping newborn babies who are born with incurable
illesses
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illnesses
can be
success
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a success
show examples
in information if scientists can figure out how to cure these babies before they are born.
for instance
, there are so many incurable diseases in
elderly
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the elderly
an elderly
show examples
community
such
as HIV and some types of cancers that
docotors
Correct your spelling
doctors
cannot help folk who tackle
this
problem too.
dispite
Correct your spelling
Despite
technique new features can be accessible by
ordinary
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the ordinary
show examples
public specifically in urban areas, in many cases poor population who live in rural areas and can not access even into a small clinic are dying
due to
the
lcak
Correct your spelling
lack
of treatment facilities. preventing illness can be another element taken into account by scientists. changing the human DNA to not get involved with
type
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the type
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of disease can
also
be the best success in the long term for humankind. the next step of
this
could
a
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be a
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chance for
nation
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a nation
the nation
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who
Correct pronoun usage
that
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can use
this
to have an infinite life without any illness, a world without hospitals and clinics can
also
be a great aspect of
this
theory.
on the other hand
, some so many superstitious
society
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societies
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do not
belive
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believe
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in these scientific theories and try to harm the other uninformed ones with their thoughts education improvement all around the globe must have the family awareness improvement with it.
to conclude
scientific improvement can be a cure for incurable diseases and prevent no disease at all in the future
Submitted by khalid.al-rashidi3 on

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Coherence and Cohesion
Focus on structuring your essay clearly with an introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Your introduction should clearly state your stance on the topic. Each body paragraph should cover a single main point supported by examples or evidence.
Coherence and Cohesion
Develop each main idea thoroughly in separate paragraphs and use linking words or phrases to ensure smooth transitions between ideas.
Task Achievement
Ensure your essay directly addresses the topic. Re-read the prompt and make sure your essay discusses the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement provided. Include relevant examples to support your viewpoints.
General
Proofread your essay to correct grammatical errors and improve clarity. Consider attending an English language course or using online resources to improve your grammar and vocabulary.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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