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Band 5

The companies and individuals should pay to clean pollution. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#companies #individuals #pollution
There is a lot of
an
Correct article usage
apply
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intensive debate about
the
Correct article usage
apply
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environmental issues nowadays.
However
, a category of people
argue
Change the verb form
argues
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 that all combatants of
the
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apply
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society must take serious stages to combat pollution
whereas
 others go
on
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in
show examples
a nother
Correct your spelling
another
show examples
 direction. Literally, l coincide completely with the initial view. On one side,
a
Correct article usage
apply
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numerous
of
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apply
show examples
experts believe that
the
Correct article usage
apply
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pollution is a disaster which
treated
Wrong verb form
treats
show examples
 the existence of universal.
For instance
, these days we notice
a
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apply
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more
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
climate changes in the
world
 ,
in addition
 to
a
Correct article usage
apply
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nother
Correct your spelling
other
 problems like a huge
raise
Correct your spelling
rise
show examples
of
Change preposition
in
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 temperatures and the global warming phenomena. What is more,
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
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scholars discuss
this
Correct determiner usage
these
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 dangerous consequences after a lot of
researchs
Correct your spelling
research
 and invite all society ( individuals,
associate
Fix the agreement mistake
associates
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) to take
this developments
Change the determiner
this development
these developments
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 in their accounting and use the clean energy rather than the power which is used today.
In addition
,
this
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these
show examples
 groups are
sound
Change the form of the verb
sounding
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 the alarm,
the
Correct word choice
that the
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world
 will become extinct unless the governments and United
nations
Capitalize word
Nations
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 organizations
formulation
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formulate
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 laws and regulations which contribute to
protect
Change the verb form
protecting
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 the planet.
On the other hand
,
a
Correct article usage
apply
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nother
Correct your spelling
other
 categories go beyond that protection of the environment are not their business.
For example
,
this
 gathering invoked the companies working
on
Change preposition
in
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gas
Correct article usage
the gas
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 field employed
a billions
Correct the article-noun agreement
billions
a billion
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 of people and liquidation of these companies will lead to unemployment.
Furthermore
,
a
Change preposition
in a
show examples
huge number of countries surrounding the
world
,
his
Correct pronoun usage
their
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economic
Replace the word
economies
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 are based on
the
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apply
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fuel , and cancelled
the
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apply
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work in
this
 field may lead
also
 to poverty and wars. The
world
 can avoid the
environment
Replace the word
environmental
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 conditions through several substitute methods which
are
Verb problem
do
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 not require terminating the work of these companies.
To sum up
, we notice today a lot of the
environment
Replace the word
environmental
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 conditions which
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
clearly
Change the word
clear
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 to everyone and
consider
Wrong verb form
considered
show examples
 a serious threat to exist of the earth. So , the governments, organizations and all the members of
civilians
Change the noun form
civilian
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 society should make more and more efforts to avoid
this complex problems
Change the determiner
this complex problem
these complex problems
show examples
. The
later
Correct your spelling
latter
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 view is unjust and only
defend
Correct subject-verb agreement
defends
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 their financial interests, so I agree that the
world
 must use
the
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apply
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clean energy rather than
the
Correct article usage
apply
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traditional power.
Submitted by mohammedelhassan811 on

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coherence cohesion
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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