Some people think that parents should teach their children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the best place to learn this. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

Recently, the phenomenon of pre-university education has sparked a heated debate.
Although
contested by many that the advantage of academic learning is highly beneficial, the disadvantage of
such
an issue is regarded thoroughly as both constructive and positive by a substantial number of individuals. I highly believe that academic training in school
instead
of a close-knit family teaching to offspring can be a plus, and I will investigate that throughout
this
essay. From a social standpoint, a pre-university environment can provide societies with noticeable effects that are rooted in the fact that the merits,
as well as
advantages of school curriculums, are crucial.
According to
my own experience, I performed an academic experiment that discovered the importance of academic tutors.
Thus
, the beneficial ramifications of the school’s facilities are visible. From a scientific point of view, a teacher’s upbringing can provide the community with negative impacts that are related to the reality that the demerits of an academic education are remarkable. As a tangible example, some scientific research undertaken by a prestigious university described the role of family ties.
Hence
, the predicted outcomes of schools are noticeable and
due to
these facts, parents should avoid teaching their children by themselves.
To conclude
,
while
there are several compelling arguments on both sides, I profoundly believe that the benefits of modern nurturing by professors and their assistants far outweigh the drawbacks. Not only do the advantages of modern pre-university facilities prove the significance of the academic environment, but
also
pinpoint possible implications.
Submitted by erfanamouie on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Achievement
To improve in Task Achievement, ensure that you directly address the prompt by discussing both views mentioned and providing your own opinion clearly. Your essay should focus on arguing the points related to parents teaching their children versus school education in becoming good members of society, rather than a general discussion on academic learning.
Coherence and Cohesion
To enhance Coherence and Cohesion, logically organize your essay into clear paragraphs, each with a singular main idea that directly relates to the essay prompt. Use linking words effectively to connect ideas within and between paragraphs. Ensure your introduction and conclusion are more explicitly connected to the essay topic and more clearly present your stance.
Task Achievement
Incorporate specific examples and clearer arguments to support your points. This will make your ideas more compelling and clear to the reader. Examples should directly relate to the topic of teaching children to be good members of society, demonstrating the effectiveness of either parental guidance or school education.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • good members of society
  • teach
  • parents
  • schools
  • responsibility
  • values
  • respect
  • empathy
  • responsibility
  • formal education
  • citizenship
  • ethics
  • social responsibility
  • lead by example
  • role models
  • conducive environment
  • extracurricular activities
  • community involvement
  • collaborate
  • holistic approach
What to do next:
Look at other essays: