You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Some countries achieve international sports by building specialised facilities to train top athletes, instead of providing sports facilities that everyone can use. Do you think this is positive or negative development? Discuss both views and give your opinion. You should write at least 250 words.

Many
countries
gain international
sports
by
make
Wrong verb form
making
show examples
up specialised
facilities
to train top
athletes
,
instead
of providing
sports
facilities
that all
peoples
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
can
use
. In my opinion,
this
statement will
being
Wrong verb form
be
show examples
a negative development in the future outweigh the positive impact.
This
essay will discuss both perspectives before presenting my own viewpoint in the impending paragraph. First and foremost, some
countries
compete to achieve international
sports
for making their
countries
more valuable and famous.
Consequently
, the
government
will make
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
sport facilities
a sport facility
show examples
sport
facilities
whether a private
facilitiy
Correct your spelling
facility
or a public
facility
.
However
, the development to construct the
sport
Change the noun form
sports
show examples
facilities
need
Correct subject-verb agreement
needs
show examples
much
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
money, either using
state
Correct article usage
the state
show examples
budget or investment.
Construct
Wrong verb form
Constructing
show examples
a private or public
facility
are having their each benefits for
athletes
also
society inside the country. Building a private
facility
means only
athletes
can
use
it.
Eventhough,
Correct your spelling
Even though
it is very essential for them as a place for training without any interruption from outside. So, they can focus on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
sports
. But, one thing
for
Add a missing verb
is for
show examples
sure, if there is no improvement for
athletes
then
the building will be useless in the future. To tackle
this
issue, it is better if the
government
build a public
facility
. The
sport
Change the noun form
sports
show examples
building
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
designing
Wrong verb form
designed
show examples
for both
athletes
and society with different two spaces
incisde
Correct your spelling
inside
.
First
Correct article usage
The first
show examples
space
include
Change the verb form
includes
show examples
gym
Correct article usage
a gym
show examples
, shower and changing room
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
private space for
athletes
and the second one is the main
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
show examples
facilitiy
Correct your spelling
facilities
facility
such
us
Correct your spelling
as
show examples
swimming
Correct article usage
a swimming
show examples
pool, badminton, football, tennis and basketball court. The
government
should make a schedule for different
use
Fix the agreement mistake
uses
show examples
,
for
instance
Add a comma
instance,
show examples
athletes
can
use
it every
weekdays
Change to a singular noun
weekday
show examples
while
society can
use
it on
weekend
Fix the agreement mistake
weekends
show examples
. In conclusion, providing
sports
facilities
that both
athletes
and communities can
use
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is the best solution for
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
.
Besides
Add a comma
Besides,
show examples
overcome
Wrong verb form
overcoming
show examples
the small budget, the building will be
merit
Add an article
a merit
show examples
for everyone in the
countries
.
Submitted by Dedeways244 on

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coherence cohesion
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coherence cohesion
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task achievement
Make sure your essay directly and fully addresses the task by discussing both views equally and elaborating your own opinion clearly.
task achievement
Use more specific examples and detailed explanations to support your arguments and make your points more convincing.
coherence cohesion
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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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