IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

Write a letter to a friend about an item you borrowed last week, that accidentally got damaged. In your letter – Describe the item. – What was the damage? – What do you intend to do to rectify the problem?

#friend #item #week #damage
Dear Jay, Hope you are doing well. I am writing
this
 letter to share
a
Correct determiner usage
some
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 bad news with you. As you remember
that
Correct word choice
apply
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last
 week,
i have
Verb problem
I
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 borrowed your
airpods
Change the capitalization
Airpods
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 for
few
Correct article usage
a few
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 days because of
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
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 great functionality and better performance. Unfortunately,
i
Change the capitalization
I
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 had an accident and one of the
pod
Fix the agreement mistake
pods
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got
Verb problem
apply
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broke into two. Let me explain the situation. When
i
Change the capitalization
I
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 first saw
this
 gadget with you
i
Change the capitalization
I
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 was amazed
withit
Correct your spelling
with it
with
.
Therfore
Correct your spelling
Therefore
,
i
Change the capitalization
I
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 borrowed it from you but yesterday night when
i
Change the capitalization
I
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 was riding my Activa,
than
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then
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 in-between because of the speed breaker my vehicle got slipped. Luckily,
i
Change the capitalization
I
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 am Okay with
few
Correct article usage
a few
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 cuts on my hand, but your
airpods
Correct your spelling
AirPods
 got smashed between the activa and land. As it
was having
Wrong verb form
has
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 a
having
Correct word choice
apply
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cover, the whole body is in good condition and one got
broke
Wrong verb form
broken
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 down into two. I was not happy with
this
 incident. It would be great if you
can
Wrong verb form
could
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 let me know the actual
prize
Correct your spelling
price
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 of the Pods
,
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apply
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 so that
i
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I
show examples
 can repay you. If you want,
i
Change the capitalization
I
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 can fix it by taking it to the shop.
Nevertheless
, it was a great device it would be hard to find someone who can fix
this
.
Afterall
Correct your spelling
After all
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,
i
Change the capitalization
I
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 am ready to pay the prize. Thanks for your consideration. Yours Faithfully Jay Chawla
Submitted by hlife4454 on

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greeting and closing
The greeting and closing of your letter are appropriately friendly and polite, fitting the context of writing to a friend. This aspect has contributed positively to your score.
single idea per paragraph
Make sure to organize the content with clear paragraphs, each conveying a single idea. While the letter includes the necessary details, organizing it into distinct paragraphs for describing the item, explaining the damage, and stating the intended solution will enhance its clarity.
complete response
Your letter satisfactorily addresses the task's requirements by describing the damaged item, explaining the resulting damage, and proposing a way to rectify the problem. To further improve, ensure every aspect of the task is fully developed with relevant details.
suitable writing tone
To maintain an appropriate tone, aim for a balance between formality and informality suitable for writing to a friend. Avoid overly formal phrases or structures that might not fit the context of a personal letter.
logical structure
Ensure logical progression of ideas by linking sentences and paragraphs smoothly. Use transition words and phrases to guide the reader through your narrative, enhancing the overall coherence of the letter.

The Closing

The style of the letter determine how you have to close it.

Check out the suggested closing sentences for each type of letter in the General IELTS Test. The closing sentence should be the last sentence of your letter.

Formal style (To someone you have not met, whose name you don’t know)

  • Yours faithfully,

Semi-formal (To someone you may or may not have met, whose last name you know)

  • Yours sincerely,

Informal (To someone you know well, whose first name you know and use)

  • Best regards,
  • Warm wishes,

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