IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The two maps below show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and in 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparision where relevant

The two maps below show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and in 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparision where relevant
#two #maps #show #road #access #city #summarise #information #features #comparision
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The given representation illustrates the city hospital's accessibility
rout
Correct your spelling
route
show examples
, in two particular
year
Change to a plural noun
years
show examples
. At
first
Add a comma
first,
show examples
 glance is
evidant
Correct your spelling
evident
evidence
 that a number of facilités
are
Wrong verb form
were
show examples
 added
while
Linking Words
 some parts
remained
Wrong verb form
remain
show examples
unchange
Correct your spelling
unchanged
, some others Parking and ... are changed. Regarding
initial
Add an article
the initial
show examples
 map,
hospital
Correct article usage
the hospital
show examples
road
Use synonyms
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
lead
Replace the word
led
show examples
 patients straight forward to
hospital
Correct article usage
the hospital
show examples
 from
city
Correct article usage
the city
show examples
road
Use synonyms
.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, as the location remained stable, the function and amount of accessibility
Verb problem
apply
show examples
had
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
changed through
examined
Correct article usage
the examined
show examples
 years.
Firstly
Linking Words
, at
junction
Add an article
the junction
show examples
 of
city
Correct article usage
the city
show examples
road
Use synonyms
 and Hospital
Use synonyms
road
Add a comma
road,
show examples
 a roundabout
had
Verb problem
was
show examples
 built
as well as
Linking Words
 the junction of the ring
road
Use synonyms
 and hospital
road
Use synonyms
 to increase the Sight of drivers.
Secondly
Linking Words
, the number of bus
stop
Fix the agreement mistake
stops
show examples
had
Wrong verb form
has
show examples
 increased.
Moreover
Linking Words
, A bus station
had
Verb problem
was
show examples
 built on the left side of Hospital
Use synonyms
road
Capitalize word
Road
show examples
 and its routes reached
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
both roundabouts.
thirdly
Linking Words
, as car park locution had not bee change. the function had been Made unique just for
staffs
Fix the agreement mistake
staff
show examples
.
Although
Linking Words
, the Public Car park had moved to the
estern
Correct your spelling
eastern
western
 side of Ring
road
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by amirisoodabeh24 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Introduction: The introduction is missing.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words road with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "changed" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • infrastructure, development, expansion, accessibility, comparative analysis, layout, direction, emergency services, facilities, pedestrian paths, urban development, strategic planning
What to do next:
Look at other essays: