The bar chart shows the participation of children in selected leisure activities in Australia.

#bar #participation #children #leisure #activities #australia

The information about the number of teenagers who

take

Verb problem

apply

show examples

participate in five different kinds of leisure activities is depicted by a given bar chart. The data has been calibrated in percentage.

To sum up

, it can be vividly manifested that the highest proportion is attributed to watching tv and videos,

while

rolle

Correct your spelling

roller

blading represents the lowest point. At first glance at the chart, it is evident that a slight discrepancy is seen between the percentile of young men and young women in rolle blading which is 40% and 35%,

correspondingly

Rephrase

respectively

show examples

Further

analysis reveals that the ratio of

boys

who get

involve

Change the form of the verb

involved

show examples

in bike riding is higher than

the

Correct determiner usage

that

show examples

girls

Change preposition

of girls

show examples

, the former

one

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

is almost 65% and the latter is about 50%. Moving to the next information, the ratio of 5 to

14 year old

Add a hyphen

14-year-old

show examples

boys

and

girls

who watch

Correct your spelling

show examples

and videos is apparent same

Verb problem

show examples

that is

accounted

Wrong verb form

accounting

show examples

Change preposition

for 99

show examples

%. Probing ahead, the

boys

play more electronic and computer games rather than the

girls

which stands at 79% and 61%, respectively.

Hence forward

Correct your spelling

Henceforward

show examples

, a considerable difference is noticed in the number of

boys

and

girls

who engage in art and craft activity.

Submitted by real.nawa on Sun Feb 18 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Introduction: The introduction is missing.

▼

Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

▼

Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words boys, girls with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "information" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "ratio" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.

▼

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

191 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6.5
band
Some people say that children should be involved in making schools' rules. Some argue that adults should be in charge of making rules. Discuss both view and give your opinion.
There is an ongoing debate about the role of children in establishing rules for their schools. While some believe that students should have a say in crafting these guidelines, others argue that adults should be solely responsible for this task. Both perspectives have merit and warrant consideration.
6
band
Universities and colleges are now offering qualifications through distance learning from the Internet rather than teachers in the classroom. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?
It is sometimes argued that higher education content can be delivered through online courses just as effectively as it can be taught in physical classrooms by teachers. While I agree that online learning has many benefits, I believe that physical classes are still very important for college students.
5.5
band
Many people use social media every day to get in touch with others and news events. Do you think the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages
Appearing of social media had a tremendous impact on contemporary life, a vast amount of individuals use them every day for communication and receiving new information. While it has plenty of benefits such as possibility of finding like-minded people, who share your interests, and receiving news in real-time, we should take into account some drawbacks such as scrolling addiction and fake news.
4
band
It is Important for chidren to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? What sort of punishment should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behaviour to children?
Recently learning differences both right and wrong for children has become a debatable issue. In this regunding, Some export Suggest that punishment is needed to learn this difference between hight and wrong. However, other's said that punishment has never to to teaching children about righ on wrong. I completely argue former view. In this essay, I will discuss both sides of the arguments and supporot my views with examples.
6.5
band
One problem faced by almost every large city is traffic congestion. What do you think the causes are? What solutions can you suggest?
Nowadays, one of the essential issues facing the majority of metropolitan society is traffic jams. There are several reasons for this tendency, and they should be tackled by a number of effective solutions.

The bar chart shows the participation of children in selected leisure activities in Australia.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people say that children should be involved in making schools' rules. Some argue that adults should be in charge of making rules. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

Universities and colleges are now offering qualifications through distance learning from the Internet rather than teachers in the classroom. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Many people use social media every day to get in touch with others and news events. Do you think the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages

One problem faced by almost every large city is traffic congestion. What do you think the causes are? What solutions can you suggest?