In many countries, good schools and medical facilities are available only in cities.some people think new teachers and doctors should work in rural areas for a few years.but others think everyone should be free to choose where they work.Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In most
of
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apply
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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countries, there are
well renowned
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well-renowned
show examples
schools and medical opportunities are accessible only in towns.some individuals believe that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
fresh
teachers
and
doctors
should start their joining in the undeveloped villages and working there for some years.
whereas
, others opine that the choice of servicing place should be left
upon
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to
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them.In
this
essay,
i
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I
show examples
will discuss both of the points. But,
i
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I
show examples
personally agree with the former view,because it is
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
great chance for
working
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work
show examples
for
the
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apply
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people
who
have
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do have
show examples
not enough facilities. Perhaps the most compelling reason why
working
Correct article usage
the working
show examples
place for the new
teachers
and
doctors
should be in rural areas is because of providing facilities to the villagers for the sake of a developed
life
.There are not enough scopes in the rural areas for education and treatment. So,they are suffering from various diseases and
depends
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depend
show examples
only
prejudices
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on prejudices
show examples
.
Additionally
,the
school going
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school-going
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children can not attend
in
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apply
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the schools as they
have
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do have
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not skilled
teachers
.
As a result
,
people
may die as earlier and
also
the students become
a labour
Correct your spelling
labourers
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which is the main fact
to destroy
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for destroying
show examples
a nation.
On the other hand
,
the
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apply
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fresh
teachers
and
doctors
get a chance to gather a lot of experience without hesitation.
Thus
they apply their book knowledge in
the
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apply
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practical
life
by dealing with
simple minded
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simple-minded
show examples
people
.That’s why a few of them may choose to live permanently with these open-hearted
people
.
On the other hand
,
their
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there
show examples
is
a
Remove the article
apply
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another view of choosing
work
Correct your spelling
a workplace
show examples
place should be left
upon on
Change preposition
to
show examples
the new
teachers
and
doctors
.
To begin
with,
every one
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everyone
show examples
should have a right to live their
life
as their own wish.If they are not
comfort
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comfortable
show examples
in the rural areas,they will not do their job cordially.
As a consequence
,their interest in their profession
become
Verb problem
apply
show examples
get
Correct subject-verb agreement
gets
show examples
away from themselves.
Secondly
, some of them want to
gather
Verb problem
gain
show examples
more degrees to achieve more
bright
Correct word choice
brighter
show examples
future. So they are
intereste
Correct your spelling
interested
to spend
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in spending
show examples
their time in complex
zone
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zones
show examples
and passing their company with experienced professionals.
Finally
, if they
are not start
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do not start
show examples
their
carrer
Correct your spelling
career
as they want,they will not shine. In conclusion,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
prefer
Verb problem
think
show examples
that sending new
teachers
and
doctors
in
Change preposition
into
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the village is a good idea for the country. Though
teachers
and
doctors
are
such
professions for the
people
,so they should serve their
life
for undeveloped society. But
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
should support them by paying a handsome salary and we all should respect them from our
soul
Fix the agreement mistake
souls
show examples
so that they can live proudly.
Submitted by Aafuankazinatoshi on

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logical structure
Ensure a clear structure by organizing your essay into introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Introduction should clearly state the topic and your stance. Body paragraphs should each address a specific point of view with examples and arguments. A conclusion should summarize your discussion and restate your opinion.
introduction conclusion present
Your essay has an introduction and conclusion, but make them more impactful. The introduction should present the topic and your opinion more clearly. In the conclusion, succinctly summarize your points and reiterate your opinion effectively.
supported main points
Use specific examples to support your arguments. Although you have mentioned general situations, incorporating real-life examples or hypothetical scenarios can significantly strengthen your points.
complete response
Make sure you completely address the task by discussing both views and giving your own opinion. Provide a balanced discussion on why some people believe new teachers and doctors should work in rural areas and why others believe in freedom of choice. Conclude the essay with a strong, personal stance on the issue.
clear comprehensive ideas
Clarify and expand your ideas to ensure they are comprehensive. Each paragraph should explore a unique aspect of the issue. Avoid simple statements; instead, delve into why those views exist and what implications they have.
relevant specific examples
Incorporate relevant, specific examples to support your views. Examples help to illustrate your points and make your arguments more convincing. They also demonstrate your understanding of the topic and ability to think critically about the issues presented.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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