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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below gives information on the differences in clothing exports from three different countries

The graph below gives information on the differences in clothing exports from three different countries
#information #differences #exports #three #countries
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The line graph illustrates
about
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information
Add an article
the information
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 on
the
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clothing exports from three different countries
namly
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namely
Myanmar
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,Japan and Colombia
in
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from
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 1999 until 2003 with instruments in millions of dollars. As seen from the graph,
Myanmar
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country has
Wrong verb form
had
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 a lower number in 1999 compared to
other
Correct article usage
the other
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 two countries with
a
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apply
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zero
million
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of
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Use synonyms
dollar
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dollars
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.
However
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 country
manages
Wrong verb form
managed
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 to climb to 800
million
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of
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dolar
Correct your spelling
dollars
dollar
 in the next year and reach a peak point of 900
million
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apply
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of
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Use synonyms
Fix the agreement mistake
dollars
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dollar
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dollars
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 in the following year.
Unfortunaly
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Unfortunately
,in 2002,
Myanmar
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 country had
meet
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met
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 the crisis and
drop
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dropped
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 dramatically to 320
million
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of
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apply
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Use synonyms
dollar
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dollars
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 and ended at 420
million
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of
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apply
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Use synonyms
dollar
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dollars
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 in 2003.
In contrast
Linking Words
,Japan started at the higher figures in 1999 with a number 580
million
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 of
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dollar
Fix the agreement mistake
dollars
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.
Linking Words
This
Correct determiner usage
These
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 trends have up and down in rates and ended at 490
million
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of
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apply
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Use synonyms
dollar
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dollars
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 after 4 years.Meanwhile,Colombia
have
Verb problem
was
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 second higher in figures with 470
million
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of
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apply
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Use synonyms
dollar
Fix the agreement mistake
dollars
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 in 1999,
this
Linking Words
trends
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trend
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have
Wrong verb form
had
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 a positive pace until reaching
at
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apply
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it
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its
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 peak
on
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in
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 2002 with a rate of 700
million
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of
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apply
show examples
Use synonyms
dollar
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dollars
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 and dropped to 610
million
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of
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apply
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Use synonyms
dollar
Fix the agreement mistake
dollars
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.
Overall
Linking Words
,Colombia and
Myanmar
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 in clothing exports have both a positive result compared to
the
Correct article usage
apply
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Japan.
Submitted by tifjong on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 73%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words myanmar, million, dollar with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "compared" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trends" was used 2 times.
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