In today’s world, private companies rather than the government pay for and conduct most scientific research. Do you think the advantages outweigh disadvantages
There are two controversial perspectives heating a debate over the fact in
this
day and age that most scientific research
is financed and carried out by private firms instead
of the governor. In my opinion, the benefits of this
can overshadow its cons
Without a shadow of a doubt, when private companies decide to pay money
and conduct scientific research
there are various benefits. To be more specific, if a company invests their money
for scientists to do research
in a specific field their biggest target is the profit they can obtain, so they will utilize various methods in order to minimize the total cost and gain as much profits
as they can. Fix the agreement mistake
profit
Therefore
, they will strictly order their scientist to follow the deadlines with a view to prevent
wasting Change the verb form
preventing
money
and time consuming
. Add a hyphen
time-consuming
As a
result
the product of their firm will be manufactured in a short period of time and more Add a comma
result,
money
-efficient than those were researched by the governor. Furthermore
, if the government lets private companies carry out scientific research
it can help them have more money
and time to allocate to other field
Change the wording
another field
other fields
such
as environment
or education
Correct article usage
the environment
On the contrary
, I think if the government lets private businesses sponsor or undertake scientific research
it will bring about significant drawbacks.Because the company has to spend a huge amount of money
on their budget to do all the research
so
they won’t let them Correct word choice
apply
to
be freely used, Change the verb form
apply
instead
if a person wants to have full access right
to all the study information it is obligatory for them to pay a certain fee.
In Correct word choice
apply
my
conclusion, there are some demerits Correct pronoun usage
apply
appear
if the Governor let private companies fund their Correct pronoun usage
that appear
money
and conduct of
scientific Change preposition
apply
research
however
it can’t overcome its meritsSubmitted by hominhtrang995 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Coherence and Cohesion
Work on providing clear topic sentences for each paragraph that align with the essay’s main argument. This will make your argument and structure more coherent.
Coherence and Cohesion
Enhance the logical flow between ideas by using a wider range of linking devices and transitional phrases. This will improve the readability and cohesion of your essay.
Task Achievement
Expand on specific examples to support your arguments. This will strengthen your task achievement score by showing a more detailed understanding of the topic.
General
Be cautious of grammar and spelling errors. Revising your essay can help in minimizing these kinds of errors, making your argument clearer and more professional.
Task Achievement
Try to maintain objectivity and present both sides of the argument before stating your opinion, especially in the conclusion. This helps in fulfilling the task requirements more comprehensively.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.