Some people think that men and women have different qualities, therefore certain jobs are suitable for men and others for women. To what extent do you agree or disagree ?

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Many individuals believe that both genders have different characteristics,
therefore
Linking Words
certain
jobs
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are suitable for
men
Use synonyms
and others for
women
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. Personally,
this
Linking Words
writer agrees with
this
Linking Words
statement and will outline the reason why in the following essay. It is vital to understand that there are many difficult
jobs
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which
men
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can do well.
This
Linking Words
is because
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
they
required
Wrong verb form
require
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
body fitness and you must
have
Verb problem
be
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
physically fit to apply
for
Correct pronoun usage
for it
show examples
.
For example
Linking Words
, construction workers
who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
always lift heavy things like brick or stone. Another point to consider is
women
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will have
better
Add an article
a better
show examples
chance than
men
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in make-up
jobs
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. There is no doubt that
women
Use synonyms
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
very good at skincare or beautifying themselves.
Therefore
Linking Words
, they are more careful about their appearances than
men
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.
For example
Linking Words
, many spa shops and cosmetic stores, which have a lot of
women
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are
staff
Wrong verb form
staffed
show examples
or the boss is always a female. Taking everything into account,
due to
Linking Words
different qualities,
men
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and
women
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will choose the most suitable
jobs
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for themselves.
However
Linking Words
, nowadays many citizens
will be
Wrong verb form
are
show examples
able to choose their
favorite
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favourite
show examples
jobs
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without the distinguishable gender.
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coherence cohesion
To enhance your essay, try to introduce a broader range of cohesive devices (linking words). This will not only improve the flow of your argument but also make the connections between ideas more explicit.
task achievement
Consider developing your main points more comprehensively by adding more detailed examples and a deeper analysis of how these examples support your argument. This will strengthen the supporting evidence for your viewpoint.
coherence cohesion
While you effectively introduced and concluded your essay, further refinement could involve making your thesis statement clearer in your introduction and ensuring your conclusion succinctly summarizes and reinforces your main arguments.
task achievement
To improve task achievement, ensure that you fully address all parts of the prompt. This includes demonstrating a critical consideration of the wider implications or discussing opposing viewpoints to show a balanced understanding of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • gender roles
  • inherent qualities
  • social dynamics
  • merit-based selection
  • advancements in technology
  • levelled the playing field
  • gender stereotypes
  • equal opportunities
  • physical differences
  • workplace
  • evolving
  • traditional view
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