Some people say that the main environmental problem in our time is the loss of particular species of animals and plants.Others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
It is often considered that a few individuals reckon that the loss of particular species of
animals
and plants are
the main environmental Correct subject-verb agreement
is
problems
. Fix the agreement mistake
problem
Whereas
, many believe that there are some more important environmental issues. In my, an inclined, there are more important environmental problems
. Thus
, this
essay will elaborate on both notions which further
leads to a logical conlclusion
.
Correct your spelling
conclusion
Commencing
, the loss of Verb problem
apply
animals
and herbs are
the main Correct subject-verb agreement
is
nature's
issue which leads Change noun form
nature
the
imbalance of Change preposition
to the
wild life
Correct your spelling
wildlife
as well as
wild forests. However
, there are lifecycles of manyfold species or plants, which is
connected to each other, and if Correct subject-verb agreement
are
anyone
of them Correct your spelling
any
get
disturbed, Change the verb form
gets
then
the whole lifecycle will be affected and as a consequence
of this
, disaster will occur. For instance
, a scientist from Japan, reveals the disadvantages of Correct article usage
the distruption
distruption
of Correct your spelling
disruption
the
Correct article usage
apply
nature
's goods and if someone do
so Change the verb form
does
then
mishappening can occure
like Correct your spelling
occur
earthquake
.
Probing ahead, the trees and Add an article
an earthquake
animals
are not only factors which give adverse effects to our nature
but there are some other problems
also
. First and foremost, there are many industries that are manufacturing various kinds of products but Change preposition
in
at
the end, they release rubbish which Change preposition
in
are
unfavourable for the environment. Change the verb form
is
Moreover
, the contemporary era includes a number of vehicles which produce detrimental gases which is not safe for the
Correct article usage
apply
animals
along with
homosapians. For example
, the manufacturing factories induce harmful waste materials and it is thrown openly which is not good for the roaming cows as they ate
Wrong verb form
eat
it
which leads them to Correct pronoun usage
them
be died
.
In a nutshell, the environmental issues do not Change to the active voice
die
have died
focused
only Change the verb form
focus
plants
and wild species rather Change preposition
on plants
than
they Correct word choice
apply
consists
of additional Change the verb form
consist
problems
. Instead
of concerntrating
on Correct your spelling
concentrating
megafauanas
and floras, they should Correct your spelling
megafauna
also
watch out other
big issues which Change preposition
for other
leads
Change the verb form
lead
nature
's to be
Wrong verb form
being
disbalanced
.Correct your spelling
imbalanced
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Task Achievement
Ensure you clearly understand both sides of the argument. Your essay could benefit from a more detailed explanation of why some might consider the loss of species the main environmental problem and further exploration of other environmental issues.
Coherence & Cohesion
To improve clarity and cohesion, work on organizing your ideas more logically. Start paragraphs with clear topic sentences and ensure each paragraph focuses on one main idea.
Task Achievement
Use more specific examples to support your points. While you mentioned a scientist from Japan and industrial pollution, further detail or additional examples could strengthen yourargument.
Coherence & Cohesion
Improve your transition between paragraphs for better flow. Use phrases like 'on the other hand,' or 'furthermore' to clearly distinguish contrasting ideas or to add information.
General
Pay attention to minor spelling and grammatical errors, as they can distract from your argument. Consider using tools or resources to polish your writing.
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