In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

#countries #people #fitness #trainer #sports #exercise #classes #development

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The majority of

people

Use synonyms

are inclined

in hiring

Change preposition

to hire

show examples

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

personal

Replace the word

personnel

show examples

rather than

involving

Wrong verb form

be involved

show examples

in sports or exercise classes to improve their

fitness

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

is mainly

due to

Linking Words

personalized focus and quick

results

Use synonyms

However

Linking Words

, there are various detrimental consequences

due to

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

trend. One of the main reasons for

this

Linking Words

approach is the benefit of focused training.

In other words

Linking Words

, having a trainer provides personal attention to the individual, and

this

Linking Words

will provide more efficient

results

Use synonyms

than attending a

group

Use synonyms

yoga or exercise class.

For example

Linking Words

, a study conducted by

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

Harvard reported that 70% of individuals who hire personal trainers to build their stamina and

fitness

Use synonyms

goals achieve

results

Use synonyms

Change preposition

of 25

show examples

% effectively.

Moreover

Linking Words

, the other privilege is that one can choose a

convienient

Correct your spelling

convenient

time to attend the gym rather than attending a

group

Use synonyms

session or playing a team sport.

This

Linking Words

is ideal for the current lifestyle of

people

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living around the world.

This

Linking Words

is to say, a person can arrange a time slot to meet

fitness

Use synonyms

goals based on their own convenience.

Although

Linking Words

people

Use synonyms

choose

this

Linking Words

approach to achieve quick

results

Use synonyms

, I see

this

Linking Words

as a negative development.

Firstly

Linking Words

, attending

group

Use synonyms

fitness

Use synonyms

sessions

provide

Correct subject-verb agreement

provides

show examples

the opportunity for individuals to meet other

people

Use synonyms

who have the same passion and goals.

Hence

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

allows

socializing

Change preposition

for socializing

show examples

and strengthening community relationships.

This

Linking Words

will not be the same when hiring a personal trainer. The only person who would be dealing with

Correct pronoun usage

this is

show examples

the trainer.

Moreover

Linking Words

, sports encourage team building and collaboration which are not part of

individual focused

Add a hyphen

individual-focused

show examples

training. In conclusion, some

people

Use synonyms

hire personalized trainers mainly to achieve quick

fitness

Use synonyms

results

Use synonyms

and

also

Linking Words

Change preposition

for

show examples

the benefit of having personalized training.

However

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

would be a negative development as it does not promote collaboration and relationship building as it does in

group

Use synonyms

sessions or sports.

Submitted by madonnasama on Mon Feb 19 2024

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Coherence & Cohesion

Introduce a wider range of cohesive devices to enhance the logical flow between your ideas and paragraphs. Utilizing synonyms, transitional phrases and ensuring each paragraph flows into the next will improve readability and cohesion.

Task Achievement

To improve task achievement, ensure that you fully address both parts of the question directly and in equal measure. This includes discussing reasons for the trend as well as thoroughly evaluating whether it's positive or negative. Incorporating more specific examples and evidence to support your arguments will also enhance your score.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

299 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

personalized workout plans
tailored
efficient
awareness
physical health
motivation
guidance
convenience
flexibility
exclusivity
status symbol
inaccessible
community engagement
social interaction
health outcomes
personal achievement
health-conscious

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In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

"The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?"

The nuclear family is well adapted to moving due to its size. Do you think children benefit in any way from moving? Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people say history is one of the most important school subjects. Other people think that, in today’s world, subjects like Science and Technology are more important than History. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people think that the computer and the Internet are important in children's studies, but others think that students can learn more effectively in schools and with teachers. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Food travels thousand of miles from far to consumer. Some people think it could be better to our enviroment and economic of people only are local produced food. What are the advantages and disadvantages?