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Writing Samples
Band 4

In today’s world, private companies rather than the government pay for and conduct most scientific research. Do you think the advantages outweigh disadvantages.

#today’s #world #companies #government #conduct #research
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There are controversial
perspective
Fix the agreement mistake
perspectives
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 heating a debate over the fact that most scientific studies are financed and carried out by private enterprises
instead
 of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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politicians. In my opinion, its demerits cannot overshadow its counterpart. Without a shadow of a doubt, there is a notable advantage to having private
companies
 spearhead scientific
research
 initiatives. by shouldering the financial burden of scientific
research
, private
companies
 alleviate pressure on government budgets. Scientific studies, particularly those involving cutting-edge technologies or extensive experimentation, can be financially taxing. By partnering with private entities or outsourcing
research
 projects to them, governments can redirect their resources to other pressing social needs,
such
 as healthcare or education.
For instance
, pharmaceutical
companies
 invest billions of dollars in drug
research
 and development, leading to groundbreaking medical discoveries that benefit society at large.
While
 the redeeming features of private
companies
 in scientific
research
, its downsides still
lingers
Correct subject-verb agreement
linger
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. The privatization of scientific
research
 raises concerns regarding transparency and accountability. Unlike government-funded
research
, which is subject to public scrutiny and regulation, privately conducted studies may lack oversight, potentially leading to ethical dilemmas or even exploitation of
research
 findings for nefarious purposes.
For example
, in the field of cybersecurity, private
companies
 developing advanced encryption algorithms may be tempted to sell their technology to malicious actors, posing a threat to global security. In conclusion, I think that its advantages may outweigh its disadvantages.
Submitted by hominhtrang995 on

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task achievement
Clarify your stance in the introduction by directly stating if you believe the advantages outweigh the disadvantages, rather than indicating it indirectly. This gives clarity to the reader from the beginning.
task achievement
Develop your main points further by adding more detail and depth to your arguments. Each paragraph should explore its main idea fully, ideally with more than one supporting example or a greater elaboration on the ones provided.
coherence and cohesion
Use clear topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph to introduce the main idea. This helps in guiding the reader through your essay's structure and argumentation.
coherence and cohesion
Maintain a more formal and consistent tone throughout the essay. Avoid colloquial expressions and ensure that your language reflects the seriousness of academic or analytical writing.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • groundbreaking technologies
  • efficiently allocate resources
  • innovative projects
  • strict timelines
  • profit motives
  • basic research
  • commercial application
  • corporate funding
  • biases in research
  • unbiased exploration
  • balanced exploration
  • public sector
  • private sector
  • synergy
  • comprehensive outcomes
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