Some people say that teenagers should work part-time and earn money. This way they will learn basic lessons about work and become more disciplined. Others arque that teenagers shouldn't sacrifice their rest and after-school activities to work. Discuss both views and give your opinion. • Write at least 250 words.

Some people say that teenagers should
work
part-time and earn money. On the one
hand
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hand,
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it is
really
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a really
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good point of view
,
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apply
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because students will learn basic lessons about
work
and become more disciplined. But In my
opinion
the most important for
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the student
a student
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student
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students
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while
they study
in
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at
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university
is to concentrate only on the educational process, because you
spent
Wrong verb form
spend
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a lot of time
for
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on
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your part-time
job
that's why you can't do your
hometask
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homework
for
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at
show examples
University
. Another moment, it's very important to rest after
university
activities, because if you are tired you can't
studying
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study
show examples
well. In these
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cases
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case
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case,
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I agree with
opinion
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the opinion
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of people saying
about
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apply
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teenagers that shouldn't
sacrify
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sacrifice
their rest and
after
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after-university
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university
activities to
work
.
On the other hand
, if students have enough time to
work
of course they should
work
. In my
opinion
working experience will help students in the future life. It’s
very
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a very
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important aspect when you're looking for a
job
,
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apply
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because if you don’t have
a
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apply
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working experience you won’t be able to get a
job
. In conclusion, I would like to say that in my
opinion
, every student should choose for themselves whether they need a
part
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part-time
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job
or not, because they have their own opinions and rights. If a student
have
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has
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enough free time, of course he can
work
, because it's very important
while
you study and live alone to earn your own money for
you
Correct pronoun usage
your
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living process, to buy everything that you want,
however
in my
opinion
your
work
shouldn’t be to the detriment of studies.
Submitted by viktoria.popova92 on

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Structure
Ensure your essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. The introduction should present the topic and your thesis, body paragraphs should discuss both views and your opinion, and the conclusion should summarize your points.
Paragraph structure
Make your paragraphs clear and cohesive by starting with a topic sentence. After that, add supporting sentences that develop the idea introduced by the topic sentence. Finally, use a concluding sentence that reinforces the paragraph's main point and links it to the essay's overall argument.
Linking words
Use a wider range of linking words to connect ideas between sentences and paragraphs. This will make your essay flow more smoothly and help the reader follow your argument more easily. Examples include 'Furthermore,' 'In contrast,' 'As a result,' etc.
Task response
Address the essay prompt fully by discussing both sides of the argument and providing your opinion. Make sure to explore each view comprehensively, provide specific reasons, and illustrate with examples, where possible.
Idea development
To improve the clarity of your ideas, plan your essay before writing. Create an outline that includes main points for each paragraph. This will help you stay focused on the essay question and avoid irrelevant information.
Specific examples
Support your arguments with specific examples or reasons. This makes your essay more persuasive and engaging. If you're discussing the benefits of part-time work for students, for example, you might include a personal anecdote or reference relevant studies.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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