Write about the following topic: A person’s worth nowadays seems to be judged according to social status and material possessions. Old-fashioned values, such as honour, kindness and trust, no longer seem important. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

It is argued that
evaluating a
, we often take into account his social
along with
his material possessions. In the meantime, society forgets about genuine values like honour, kindness, and trust. I personally do believe those three are the most valuable qualities and will explain my point of view in
essay. It is great to have financial independence, material goods, and high
, a lot of opportunities open up, like
directions of investment, environmental enhancements, increase in public quality of life, etc. All
provides a great starting point for assessing the
, but
is not enough. I think we have to be honest
making estimates and judgments because we need to consider what the
has already done with
power and what it does.
For example
, I used to work for one of the largest IT companies in the world, and the CEO was quite shy, but he spent a huge amount of his personal assets to make the area outside the office look like Disney Land, and it was done to say "thank you" to the company workers.
, it would not be possible without these old-fashioned things like honour, truth, kindness, and many others. A
who is all about
is not able to bring a wealthy life into society.
In contrast
, the honest and honoured one will act as a magnet for others and,
as a result
, will share his best qualities and values, making other people better by default. In conclusion, I can say that
is definitely important,
as well as
kindness and honour. So, I could rephrase
as "Without being kind and honest, it does not matter how rich or statusful a
Submitted by serginio.nick on

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Task Achievement
To improve your score in the Task Achievement criterion, ensure that your essay fully addresses all parts of the task. While you have presented a clear opinion and relevant examples, expanding on how modern society potentially undervalues traditional values could provide a more comprehensive response.
Coherence & Cohesion
To enhance coherence and cohesion, consider linking ideas more seamlessly across paragraphs and within them. Using a wider range of cohesive devices, such as synonymy and ellipsis, could make the transition between ideas smoother. Additionally, varying sentence structures can add to the coherence of your essay.
Task Achievement
Regarding Task Achievement, incorporating a wider range of specific examples and discussing counterarguments could strengthen your argument. This demonstrates an ability to critically engage with the topic and consider multiple viewpoints, which is valued highly.
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