​Some people think that all university students should study whatever they like. Others believe that they should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in thefuture, such as those related to science and technology. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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A part of the society believes that learners should be allowed to choose their
subjects
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

in the university.
While
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
Remove the comma
apply

It appears that you have an unnecessary comma after the subordinating conjunction While. Consider removing the comma.

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others say that they should study
subjects
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

such
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

as
science
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

and computer which will be useful in
future
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. I wholeheartedly agree that scholars should pick
subjects
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

of their own interest because all
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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tutees are not excellent in studies, they might have
interest
Correct article usage
an interest

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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in other skills like craft, dancing and singing that could help them to make their career. The primary reason to support the first testimonial is that every individual
do
Change the verb form
does

The plural verb do not does not appear to agree with the singular subject every individual. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

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not have
same
Correct article usage
the same

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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thinking capability.
Therefore
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, there are some juveniles who do not pass with good grades but they have excellent creativity skills, which could help them to get successful in
future
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
All
Rephrase
Not all

There may be an adverb issue here.

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Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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the
Correct article usage
apply
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students
do not
Verb problem
apply

There may be a verb use issue here.

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have dreams
to become
Change preposition
of becoming

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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engineers, technicians or doctors
Correct word choice
apply
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Correct word choice
apply

It seems that conjunction use may be incorrect here.

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Correct word choice
apply
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whereas
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, they have
Correct article usage
the desire
show examples
Correct article usage
the desire

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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desire
Correct article usage
the desire
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to become famous singers, dancers or cricketers to earn name and fame.
For example
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, in an interview, Virat Kholi
told
Verb problem
said

There may be a verb use issue here.

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that his parents had
desire
Correct article usage
a desire

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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to see their child as a lawyer but, he followed his interest and became a famous cricketer and
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has

It seems that the verb have does not agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

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net
Add an article
a net

The noun phrase net worth seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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worth of 10 billion dollars annually. On the flip side, if the learners choose
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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subjects
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

like
science
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

, maths and
computer
Fix the agreement mistake
computers

It seems that computer may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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then
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

they can have relentless job opportunities in
their
Change the word
the

The word their may be incorrect in this context. Consider changing it.

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future
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

because
science
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

and technology are developing
at
Change preposition
to

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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an
Change the article
a

The article an may be incorrect. Consider changing it to agree with the beginning sound of the following word great.

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great extent and in the
future
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

,
the
Correct article usage
a

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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variety of technological jobs will be available.
Hence
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, adults
those
Correct pronoun usage
who

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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are attending
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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science
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

schools,
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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have bright
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
future
Fix the agreement mistake
futures

It seems that future may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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with huge earning packages.
For instance
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, scientists are giving more importance to the development of
roberts
Change the capitalization
Roberts

If you don’t want roberts to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

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so that, they can replace humans to perform heavy load tasks and in
future
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

, the demand for the number of scientists is going to rise enormously to develop artificial humans and
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

job pays billions of dollars to the person.
To conclude
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
although
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

learning
subjects
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

like
science
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

and technology in university is instrumental indeed
but
Remove the conjunction
apply

It appears that the word but is unnecessary in this sentence. Consider removing it.

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, it is more appropriate for the students when they are allowed to choose their own
subjects
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

because they might not be good at academic
subjects
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

but, they have other beneficial skills like dancing, singing to succeed in their careers.

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task achievement
Your introduction effectively sets the stage for the discussion, but consider a clearer thesis statement that directly addresses both views before stating your position.
task achievement
While your essay includes relevant examples, ensuring a more precise connection between these examples and your argument will strengthen your case. Whenever presenting an example, explicitly state how it supports your point to ensure clarity.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a fair structure; however, try to improve the logical flow between paragraphs by using a wider range of linking words. This will help guide the reader through your argument more smoothly.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that all sentences within the paragraph support this main idea. Some paragraphs in your essay deviate from their main point, which can confuse readers.
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