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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart below shows the changes that took place in three different areas of crime in New Port city center from 2003 to 2012.

The chart below shows the changes that took place in three different areas of crime in New Port city center from 2003 to 2012.
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The line graph provides data about the changes in three areas of crime in New Port city centre between 2003 to 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
, in all
years
Use synonyms
robbery
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 had the lowest
number
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 of
incidents
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. As can be seen,
initially
Linking Words
robbery
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 had the lowest figure of
incidents
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 with
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
rate
Use synonyms
 of roughly 600,
whereas
Linking Words
,
burglary
Use synonyms
 had the highest
number
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 of
incidents
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 at approximately 3400. From 2003 to 2004 the
rate
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 of
burglary
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 rose reaching
at
Change preposition
apply
show examples
its peak accounting for 3750. From 2004 to 2008 the
rate
Use synonyms
 of
burglary
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 declined and in 2008 the
rate
Use synonyms
 was 1250. Over the
years
Use synonyms
 the
rate
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 of
burglary
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 increased and in 2012 the
rate
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 was a little less than 1500. Originally the
rate
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 of
car
Use synonyms
theft
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 was roughly 2750. From 2003 to 2006 the
rate
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 of
car
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theft
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 dropped by approximately 750 from 2750 to 2000. Over the
years
Use synonyms
car
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theft
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 had some minor changes and in 2012 the
rate
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 of
car
Use synonyms
theft
Use synonyms
 was roughly 2750 which was in 2003. In 2003 the
rate
Use synonyms
 of
robbery
Use synonyms
 was roughly 600. In 2015 the
rate
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 of
robbery
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 reached
at
Change preposition
apply
show examples
its peak at 900. Over the
years
Use synonyms
 the
rate
Use synonyms
 of
robbery
Use synonyms
 saw some changes,
however
Linking Words
 in 2012
robbery
Use synonyms
 had the lowest
number
Use synonyms
 of
incidents
Use synonyms
 at 750. In 2012
robbery
Use synonyms
 had the lowest
number
Use synonyms
 of
incidents
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 at 750, meanwhile,
car
Use synonyms
theft
Use synonyms
 had the highest
number
Use synonyms
 of
incidents
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by tmargaryan2006 on

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Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words years, robbery, number, incidents, rate, burglary, car, theft with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "roughly" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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