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Band 6.5

The pie charts below compare water usage in San Diego, California and the rest of the world.

The pie charts below compare water usage in San Diego, California and the rest of the world.
#water #usage #san #diego #california #rest #world
The chart
has showed
Wrong verb form
shows
show examples
 the information
Change preposition
on that
show examples
that
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
use
Change the verb form
uses
show examples
 of
water
 in San
Diego
County
,
California
 and the rest of the world, and
separate
Correct subject-verb agreement
separates
show examples
 the types of
water
usage
to
Change preposition
into
show examples
 residential,
industry
Replace the word
industrial
show examples
 and
agriculture
. First of all, we
concerned
Add a missing verb
are concerned
show examples
 about
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
residential
use
. In San
Diego
County
, the residential
use
 is far more than the other two types,
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
 almost at 60%.
Secondly
, in
California
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
residential
water
usage
also
 accounts for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
39%. But the situation is totally different
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Worldwide, it
take
Change the verb form
takes
show examples
 over a little place just
accounts
Wrong verb form
accounting
show examples
 for 8%.And
then
 ,change our sights to the industry
water
usage
. The proportion in
three
Correct article usage
the three
show examples
area
Change to a plural noun
areas
show examples
 are very similar, there are nearly 33%
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 residential was account in
California
, and the residential
use
 is equal in Sand
Diego
County
 and Worldwide, at 23%. There are
quit
Correct your spelling
quite
show examples
different
Replace the word
differences
show examples
 in
agriculture
use
, it takes the majority
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
worldwide almost at 69%, and in
California
 just
account
Correct subject-verb agreement
accounts
show examples
 for 28%.In San
Diego
County
,
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
only 17%
agriculture
Change preposition
of agriculture
show examples
Add a missing verb
is use
show examples
use
Replace the word
used
show examples
 at all. In summary,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
water
usage
 is consumed by homes, industry and
agriculture
 proportions, different place has different
situation
Fix the agreement mistake
situations
show examples
,
it
Correct word choice
and it
show examples
affect
Wrong verb form
is affected
show examples
 by many factors.Obversely,
agriculture
use
play
Correct subject-verb agreement
plays
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 role character of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
water
usage
 in the world.
Submitted by sunnylyu0165 on

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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words use, water, diego, county, california, usage, agriculture with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • proportion
  • households
  • significant
  • industrial use
  • implications
  • agriculture
  • geographical
  • climatic
  • economic factors
  • patterns
  • sustainability
  • practices
  • surprising
  • exceptionally
  • improvements
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