Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organized group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own. Discuss both the views and give your opinion.

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Raising a child is a rewarding but difficult task that all parents go through.
While
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school occupies most of a child's day, it is important to take
part
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in extracurricular
activities
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as well. Opinions differ on whether organised
group
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activities
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are best for
children
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or should they learn to occupy themselves on their own. In
this
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essay, we will discuss both views.
Group
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activities
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promote healthy peer interaction and social skills. A study published in the Journal of Frolic in the year 2025 has shown that
children
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who took
part
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in a 30-minute
group
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activity for >10 hours a week had 30% higher problem-solving skills compared to peers who took
part
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in individualised
activities
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. Taking
part
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in organised social
activities
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can
hence
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help
children
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learn important life skills.
On the other hand
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, only doing
activities
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with other kids can
also
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lead to peer pressure and the problems of bullying. Many introverted
children
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also
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find social tasks mentally stressful and distressing. In my opinion,
children
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must be exposed to both
group
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activities
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as well as
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be encouraged to occupy themselves on their own as well.
This
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will help them not only become well-adjusted socially but
also
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promote individual personality growth
Submitted by surabhichattree on

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Task Achievement
Ensure to provide a more balanced discussion on both views before stating your own opinion. This helps in demonstrating an in-depth analysis of the topic.
Coherence and Cohesion
Try incorporating a wider range of linking words and phrases to enhance the flow of ideas and arguments across paragraphs. This will improve the coherence of the essay.
Task Achievement
Expand on your examples by providing more specific details or data to support your points. This adds strength to your arguments and enhances task achievement.

Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • encourage
  • occupied
  • organized
  • group activities
  • benefits
  • social
  • teamwork skills
  • interpersonal skills
  • friendship
  • discipline
  • time management
  • interests
  • hobbies
  • independent play
  • creativity
  • problem-solving skills
  • self-reliance
  • explore
  • discover
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