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Writing Samples
Band 4

It is becoming increasingly popular to have a year off between finishing school and going to university. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?

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It has been observed that,
nowdays
Correct the word
nowadays
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 a popular trend of taking a
year
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 off after completing high school and joining a
university
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 is rising. There are numerous
of
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apply
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benefits
as well as
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 drawbacks regarding
this
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 new trend. Both
the
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apply
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aspects are articulated in the upcoming paragraphs with valid explanations or examples. Analyzing the brighter side the foremost one is that, the students will be able to relax their mind and body.
For instance
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, they are always studying so hard and don't take any necessary breaks. So, they would do
some thing
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something
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 that
calm
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calms
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 their mind like going on
trip
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a trip
the trip
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, watching
favourite
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their favourite
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 movies and many more.
Moreover
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,the pupils would
also
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 give time to their
family
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families
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. Since all pupils love their
family
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families
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 and
wanted
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want
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 to spend time with them they are unable to do
because
Rephrase
so because
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,of the loads of homework and
continuation
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the continuation
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 of coming
exam
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exams
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. So ,
the
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they
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 could spend and enjoy their time with their
familys
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families
family
.These are some pros related to it .
However
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, there is a darker side too.
To begin
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 with, all the scholars will be wasting a whole
year
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 . For
examples
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example
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,they can be in
second
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the second
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year
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 of
university
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 but , as they are taking a break of 12 months they will be one
year
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 behind than others.
Besides
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this
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 ,
due to
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 a gap in learning the minds of school boys and girls might
becomes
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become
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 dull. Despite they are very knowledgeable and intelligent
but
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apply
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not studying for a whole
year
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 and only relaxing could affect the memory consumption of their mind and it can
became
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become
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 slow during the starting days of
university
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.
Hence
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 ,these are some cons related to it
To sum up
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, there are major merits and demerits related to taking a break of one
year
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Fix the infinitive
to completeing
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completeing
Correct your spelling
complete
the academy and
starting
Wrong verb form
start
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
university
Use synonyms
.
Therefore
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 it is a mutual trend regarding both the aspects of advantages and disadvantage

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coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and is expanded with explanations, reasons, or examples. Try to dedicate one paragraph to advantages and another to disadvantages, ensuring there's a logical flow from one idea to the next.
introduction conclusion present
Introduce your essay with a clearer overview of what will be discussed, summarizing the main advantages and disadvantages briefly. Conclude your essay with a summary of these points and your personal opinion or a final insight.
supported main points
Enhance the clarity of your main points by separating them more distinctly and developing each with more detailed examples or reasons. This makes your arguments stronger and easier to follow.
complete response
Fully address the task by ensuring you delve deeply into both the drawbacks and benefits of taking a year off. Present your ideas comprehensively and balance your discussion between advantages and disadvantages.
clear comprehensive ideas
Clarify your ideas by presenting them in a more organized and detailed manner. Avoid vague statements by offering concrete examples or explaining the significance of each point more thoroughly.
relevant specific examples
Incorporate more concrete, detailed examples to support your claims about the advantages and disadvantages. Specific real-life examples or hypothetical situations can significantly strengthen your argument.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • gap year
  • work experience
  • internships
  • traveling
  • life experiences
  • personal development
  • independent
  • self-reliant
  • educational progress
  • graduation timeline
  • financial burden
  • academic momentum
  • structured academic environment
What to do next:
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