the diagram shows how rainwater is collected for the use of drinking water in Australian towns.
The graph above shows us the
process
of collecting the rainwater for drinking water
which is used in Australian town
.
Fix the agreement mistake
towns
Overall
it’s visible that the process
starts with collecting flowing water
and finishes after a big purifying process
by adding chemicals into this
uncleaned water
.
Firstly
the rainwater is flowing
to the roof what after it goes through Wrong verb form
flows
drain
and moves to Correct article usage
a drain
water
filter in order to Correct article usage
the water
being
cleaned, after it accumulates in storage where the all uncleaned Change the verb
be
water
gathered
, after Add a missing verb
is gathered
what
it moves to Correct word choice
that
water
treatment with the help of water
tube. After a hard and long process
, chemicals are being
added to Unnecessary verb
apply
water
in order to make it pure and drinkable. Finally
it goes straight to houses by Add a comma
Finally,
water
tubes in a drinkable and pure condition. And
Correct word choice
This
this
is the
hard but at the same time useful Change the article
apply
process
of rainwater being
drinkable in Australian towns.Verb problem
becoming
Submitted by muradismailbayli on
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Contractions: Don't use contractions.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words process, water with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "shows" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "moves" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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