IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

People should only concentrate on a single skill for life because it is the best way to succeed. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
There are divergent opinions about the best way to succeed in life. On the
one
Use synonyms
 hand, concentrating on a single
skill
Use synonyms
 is useful for developing detailed expertise, but
on the other hand
Linking Words
,
now days
Correct the word
nowadays
show examples
, developing various
skills
Use synonyms
 is more valuable to adapt
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 a rapidly changing world. Based on
this
Linking Words
, I personally believe that having only
one
Use synonyms
skill
Use synonyms
doesn't
Verb problem
isn't
show examples
 enough to succeed anymore, but spending much
time
Use synonyms
 on getting other
skills
Use synonyms
 and
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 synergies will follow
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
them toward their successful life.
To begin
Linking Words
 with
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
,
people
Use synonyms
 should not waste their lifetime
to concentrate
Change the verb form
concentrating
show examples
 on learning and utilizing only
one
Use synonyms
skill
Use synonyms
. After achieving the
one
Use synonyms
skill
Use synonyms
, they have plenty of
time
Use synonyms
 to get more technics to go ahead to their goals.
For example
Linking Words
, many old specialists in a field, live without jobs these days.
This
Linking Words
 is because their major
skills
Use synonyms
 are replaced with new technologies from young
people
Use synonyms
. So, if the old group wants to keep having jobs after retirement, having a new
skill
Use synonyms
 is necessary to do what they want to.
This
Linking Words
 shows that
people
Use synonyms
 should consider concentrating on getting more
skills
Use synonyms
 for life after retirement for 40-50 years. On top of that, if some
people
Use synonyms
 have just
one
Use synonyms
skill
Use synonyms
, they should learn more and more
skills
Use synonyms
 related to the
one
Use synonyms
 by taking
time
Use synonyms
. The world has been changing, and
people
Use synonyms
 don't recognize how it is running fast and bringing new technologies.
For example
Linking Words
, traditional farmers have grown plants to supply food ingredients for
people
Use synonyms
 by using modern-
time
Use synonyms
 heavy vehicles.
However
Linking Words
, recently, scientists have successfully developed new machines with AI technology to detect insects and weeds and destroy them by operating those machines. It will require only
one
Use synonyms
 machine operator to cultivate a spacious farm field.
As a result
Linking Words
, to achieve successful achievements,
people
Use synonyms
 should acquire more updated or new
skills
Use synonyms
 in
this
Linking Words
 period.
To sum up
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 should spend much
time
Use synonyms
 learning new
skills
Use synonyms
 after mastering
one
Use synonyms
skill
Use synonyms
, and
then
Linking Words
 studying many
skills
Use synonyms
 related to the
one
Use synonyms
 deeply to succeed. For these reasons, having only
one
Use synonyms
skill
Use synonyms
 is not enough to succeed and learning more
skills
Use synonyms
 is mandatory.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
To enhance coherence, ensure your paragraphs follow a logical structure. Start with an introductory sentence, follow with supporting details, and conclude with a summary or a linking sentence to the next paragraph.
coherence cohesion
Utilize a wider range of linking words and cohesive devices to improve the flow of ideas and paragraph transitions.
task achievement
For higher task achievement, enrich your essay with more specific examples and evidence to support your arguments. This adds depth and persuasiveness to your response.
task achievement
Ensure that your essay directly addresses the prompt consistently throughout. While you have covered the topic, make sure that each paragraph ties back to the question more explicitly.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: