In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this massage?

#cultures #children #massage

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It seems that with the passing of time,

children

Use synonyms

have become smarter because they are

technology

Correct article usage

the technology

show examples

generation and the modern era.

Overall

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, some

children

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want to control their own decision and their own

things

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also

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achieving complicated

things

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to prove their personality. In my opinion, I will tend to agree with

this

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statement and I will first provide some ideas why and

then

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look at some benefits. On the one hand, some people believe that should not be alone when they make their decisions,

however

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this

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is not a good way to rearing

children

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nevertheless

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, I will say why does affect them

also

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in their future.

Firstly

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, when parents let their

children

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make their decisions

subsequently

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they will have a strong personality and no negative person affect their lives,

for instance

Linking Words

the

Correct word choice

if the

show examples

child tells his parents that he wants to do

this

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also

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, he can say yes or no to anything he wants,

therefore

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, he will become aware of right and wrong, unlike a child who does not achieve difficult

things

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On the other hand

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, in today’s society, some parents prefer to know what their kids are doing and they are under their supervision,

therefore

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, in the future, some kids can not achieve anything independently,

additionally

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, they become unusefulness in their society,

therefore

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children

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must be made act freely in some matters.

To sum up

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, in my view, I see that the

children

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who achieve their difficult

things

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also

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learn quickly and have strong personalities.

Submitted by sesjej1330 on Fri Feb 23 2024

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task achievement

Focus clearly on the task question and make sure to answer both sides of the argument (advantages and disadvantages) directly and clearly.

coherence cohesion

Enhance your essay structure by having a clear introduction that includes your thesis statement, body paragraphs each discussing a single main idea, and a concise conclusion summarizing your arguments.

task achievement

Use specific examples to support your arguments in the body paragraphs. This will help to demonstrate the relevance of your points more effectively.

coherence cohesion

To improve coherence, make sure that your ideas flow logically from one paragraph to another, and use cohesive devices (such as linking words) appropriately to aid in the reader's understanding.

coherence cohesion

Ensure you have a conclusion that summarizes your key points and restates your position in relation to the question asked.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

245 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Encouragement
Motivation
Determination
Work Ethic
Persistence
Self-esteem
Confidence
Challenges
Unrealistic Expectations
Disappointment
Frustration
Limitations
External Factors
Pressure
Stress
Anxiety
Mental Health

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In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this massage?

Fully explain your ideas

The role of education is to prepare children for the modern world. Schools should cut subjects such as arts and music out of the curriculum so that children can focus on subject such as information technology. To what extent do you agree?

As most people spend a major part of their adult life at work, job satisfaction is an important element of individual wellbeing. What factors contribute to job satisfaction for all workers? How realistic is the expectation of job satisfaction for all workers?

Differences between countries become less evident each year. Nowadays, all over the world people share the same advertising, brands, eating habits and TV channels. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages of these fashions

There is an increasing trend around the world of married couples deciding not to have children. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for couples who decide to do this.

In some countries, students pay their college or university fees, while in some others, the government pays for them. Do the advantages of governments paying for fees outweigh the disadvantages?