IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

The bar chart below shows average UK salaries, by city.

The bar chart below shows average UK salaries, by city.
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The bar chart gives information about, the normal Great Britain wages based on different
cities
Use synonyms
. The amount of
salary
Use synonyms
 varies
according to
Linking Words
cities
Use synonyms
. It divides the
cities
Use synonyms
 into two states mainly
England
Use synonyms
 and
Scotland
Use synonyms
, out of that
London
Use synonyms
, Manchester, Bristol,
Birmingham
Use synonyms
, and Cambridge come in
England
Use synonyms
.
Whereas
Linking Words
, Glasgow and Edinburgh lie in
Scotland
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen that in
England
Use synonyms
London
Use synonyms
 is the first highest-paid city and Bristol is second.
In contrast
Linking Words
 to
Scotland
Use synonyms
 Edinburgh is the one where
people
Use synonyms
 are given high pay as compared to Glasgow. The number of
people
Use synonyms
 is greater in
London
Use synonyms
whereas
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 ratio is less in Cambridge.
To begin
Linking Words
 with,
London
Use synonyms
 is at the highest rank where the
people
Use synonyms
 are taken a greater amount of average salaries as compared to other
cities
Use synonyms
.
Whereas
Linking Words
 Cambridge is the second number the average
salary
Use synonyms
 rate is about 29,854
in contrast
Linking Words
 to
London
Use synonyms
 which is about 33,634.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
Birmingham
Use synonyms
 is considered at lowest number among other
cities
Use synonyms
 in
England
Use synonyms
 where the normal
salary
Use synonyms
 is about 25,531.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, in
Scotland
Use synonyms
 Edinburgh the average
salary
Use synonyms
 is about 27,592
however
Linking Words
, it is less in Glasgow which is about 26,150.
In addition
Linking Words
, residents of Manchester, and
Birmingham
Use synonyms
 receive an almost similar amount of average salaries which is about 25,909 for Manchester
people
Use synonyms
 and 25,531 for
people
Use synonyms
 of
Birmingham
Use synonyms
 respectively.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "in contrast, whereas".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words cities, salary, england, scotland, london, birmingham, people with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "compared" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "gives" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 7 times.
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