Some people believe that engaging in an active pastime does more to develop children`s life skills than time spent reading. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Children like to explore new things in their lives, especially related to playing around with their peers.
This
brings on debate
that some people would agree if children Add an article
the debate
a debate
involving
in entertaining Wrong verb form
involved
activities
occur in an ancient time because it can led
to children’s developmental skills compared to spending time Change the verb form
lead
be led
on
reading a book. Change preposition
apply
This
essay would help to explain an idea as the background to support the statement followed by supporting points.
Parents like to involve their children and divide house chores for each of the family members. To strengthen this
, in Indonesia, there is a cultural occasion every two weeks to maintain home cleanliness, such
as gardening. Young generations should be encouraged into many home assignments..
Replace the punctuation
.
...
This
has positive impacts on their maturity as well as
increasing their responsibility because they are frightened if they fail to pass or finish those actions.
Jumping into traditional activities
also
make
someone increase their fitness routines. Before the 21st century, teens are likely to enjoy their time playing around with their Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
companion
after finishing Fix the agreement mistake
companions
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
schools
. Hide and seek are the profound historical toys that people most Fix the agreement mistake
school
enjoyed
. When taking part Wrong verb form
enjoy
on
Change preposition
in
this
plays
, one of them should stay and close their eyes and the remaining ones should run to find a safe place. The game is starting, so everyone should chase each other Fix the agreement mistake
play
and
it Correct word choice
apply
also
impacts their physical activities
and definitely
it would prevent them from many non-communicable diseases once they do it regularly.
Add a comma
definitely,
To conclude
, engaging in an active pastime has more possibilities to develop children’s life skills, such
as maturity and being responsible for their own tasks and daily physical activities
. They should be encouraged as well as
these activities
bring positive impact on people’s liveSubmitted by ru.kabiru.biru on
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Introduction
Ensure a clear thesis statement in your introduction, outlining the scope and direction of your essay.
Cohesion
Use a range of linking words and phrases to help the flow of your essay, but make sure they are used accurately.
Coherence
Develop your paragraphs fully. Each should start with a clear topic sentence, followed by explanations, examples, and a concluding sentence.
Task Response
Directly address the question throughout your essay to ensure relevance. Clearly state your position and consistently argue in support of it.
Examples
Provide a wider variety of examples to support your points, ensuring they are specifically linked to the development of life skills.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
