nowadays a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and trearments instead of visiting their doctors.do think this is a positive or negative dvelopment?

#people #health #alternative #medicines #trearments #doctors #dvelopment

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Conventional medicine is being replaced with alternative medicine by some people.

While

there are plenty of bright sides regarding

other kind

Change the wording

another kind

other kinds

show examples

of treatments, there are

also

complications surrounding

this

approach. Looking at the positive sides of

this

method

first,

with

coming

Correct article usage

the coming

show examples

of other kinds of

cure

Fix the agreement mistake

cures

show examples

such

homeopathy

Change the spelling

homoeopathy

show examples

, using herbal medicine and

acupancture

Correct your spelling

acupuncture

the long queues behind the doctors' offices have

been

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

declined. Individuals trust to old treatments that their grandmothers

advice

Replace the word

advise

show examples

them as they are not only

availabe

Correct your spelling

available

but

also

convenient.

Furthermore

, there is no need any longer, for alleviating

ailment

Correct article usage

the ailment

show examples

back

Correct article usage

the back

show examples

to be undergone of surgery because trained individuals called chiropractic by massaging the hurting spot,

reduce

Correct word choice

and reduce

show examples

the pain without putting any scars. Turning to the dark sides of

this

phenomenon,

firstly

we can safely say that the consequences of using them are not neither assessed nor even considered. These days, anybody claims to know a new way to treat the

paitients

Correct your spelling

patients

and who knows whether it would be effective or not.

Secondly

, these fake doctors do not have any licences or any registered union until

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

hurt patient by their treatment could bring a prosecution against them.

The

Correct article usage

Last

show examples

last

but not least, it could be there is a risk of running out of golden time for

who

Correct pronoun usage

those who

show examples

could have cured.

To conclude

although

some people have been healed by

this

approach, trusting them when seems to be reasonable that we are disappointed by real conventionalists;

otherwise

, trusting them might

be resulted

Change to the active voice

result

have resulted

show examples

in irrecoverable complications.

Submitted by amirhossein7179 on Sat Feb 24 2024

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Grammar & Spelling

Be mindful of spelling and grammatical accuracy throughout your essay. Errors such as 'acupancture' (acupuncture), 'availabe' (available), and misuse of plural and singular forms can detract from the overall clarity and professionalism of your writing.

Introduction & Conclusion Structure

Strengthen your introduction and conclusion. Your introduction should more clearly state the topic and your stance on it, while your conclusion should succinctly summarize your arguments and reiterate your viewpoint.

Essay Structure

Enhance the logical structure of your essay by more clearly organizing paragraphs around main ideas, and explicitly stating how each example supports your argument. Transition words can help improve the flow between sections.

Task Achievement

For a higher score in task achievement, ensure that your response fully addresses the prompt. Gar more specific and varied examples to illustrate your points. Ensure your position is clear and maintained throughout the essay.

Coherence & Cohesion

To improve coherence and cohesion, work on the flow and connectivity of ideas within and between paragraphs. Use a range of cohesive devices and make sure paragraphs are well-developed around a single theme.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

249 words

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nowadays a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and trearments instead of visiting their doctors.do think this is a positive or negative dvelopment?

Fully explain your ideas

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport.

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary schools rather than secondary schools. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Task 1: diagram showing Brick manufacturing process