IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

In many countries people use electric devices for daily house chores while some think it is an expensive energy source and we ought to use gas instead. Discuss both views and give your opinion.?

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Introduction
Nowadays.most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
countries are using electric devices for daily
house
Use synonyms
 chores others think
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
electric
Replace the word
electricity
show examples
 is
expensive
Correct article usage
an expensive
show examples
 energy source it will
be change
Change the verb form
be changed
show examples
 to
Use synonyms
use
Wrong verb form
using
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
gas
Body paragraph 1
In my opinion. It is good for
that
Correct determiner usage
those
show examples
 countries to
use
Use synonyms
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
electric
Replace the word
electricity
show examples
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
daily I will
Correct your spelling
discuss
dicuss
Correct your spelling
discuss
 both views
Body paragraph 2
Firstly
Linking Words
 with first opinion is that countries
use
Use synonyms
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
electric
Body paragraph 3
Why
this
Linking Words
 country
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 using
this
Linking Words
 type because it is
Correct your spelling
miscarry
nescarory
Correct your spelling
necessary
 now to have
for example
Linking Words
 :
vacuum
Correct article usage
a vacuum
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
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electric one because it doesn'
t
Use synonyms
 take
Correct your spelling
a long
show examples
along
Correct your spelling
a long
show examples
time
Use synonyms
 and it is easy for
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 to clean the
house
Use synonyms
moreover
Linking Words
 it doesn'
t
Use synonyms
west
Verb problem
waste
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
time
Use synonyms
 with clean because it is
Important
Fix capitalization
important
show examples
 for a
peolpe
Correct your spelling
people
 every day clean
them
Correct your spelling
the
show examples
house
Use synonyms
 and it isn'
t
Use synonyms
 struggle for them
Body paragraph 4
It
is organise
Change the verb form
is organised
show examples
 for any
people
Use synonyms
 start to Clean and finish
this
Linking Words
 type of electric
Body paragraph 5
and it is for
use
Use synonyms
this
Linking Words
 type of
electric
Replace the word
electricity
show examples
 daily but with a smart person that will be fine
Body paragraph 6
On
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
hand
Add a comma
hand,
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 some
people
Use synonyms
 think about the bought
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
electric
Replace the word
electricity
show examples
 so it west
a
Correct article usage
apply
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money and it is bad.
Body paragraph 7
Most
of
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apply
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 can'
t
Use synonyms
 lose
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
money I
Correct your spelling
prefer
perfer
Correct your spelling
prefer
 to buy
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
clothes and food or
gift
Correct article usage
a gift
show examples
 rather than
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
electric
Replace the word
electricity
show examples
 daily because the
electric
Replace the word
electricity
show examples
 and classic are
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 same but the
different
Replace the word
difference
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 is westing
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
time
Use synonyms
 and it
smaes
Correct your spelling
makes
 quality
Conclusion
To sum up
Linking Words
 .I am using
electric
Replace the word
electricity
show examples
 daily because it is easy
for used
Change preposition
to use
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
and it doesn'
t
Use synonyms
west
Verb problem
waste
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
time
Use synonyms
 only 20 minutes every day
clean
Fix the infinitive
to clean
show examples
 the
house
Use synonyms
 other it takes one hour it is
struggle
Correct article usage
a struggle
show examples
this
Linking Words
 is up to the person

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coherence cohesion
Improve the organization of your essay by including clear introductory and concluding paragraphs that state the topic and summarize your opinion and arguments respectively.
coherence cohesion
Use paragraphs to separate different ideas and arguments. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea, supported by explanations or examples.
coherence cohesion
Improve your essay's logical structure by clearly distinguishing between the two views and your own opinion. Make sure each viewpoint and your opinion are clearly stated and well-supported.
task achievement
Address the task more completely by discussing both views thoroughly before presenting your own opinion. Make sure each view is explored with sufficient depth and balanced analysis.
task achievement
Use more specific examples to support your arguments. Examples help to illustrate your points and make your arguments more convincing.
task achievement
Check for grammatical accuracy and punctuation in your writing. Mistakes can distract from the clarity of your ideas and arguments.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • daily house chores
  • expensive energy source
  • electric devices
  • convenience
  • efficiency
  • renewable sources
  • carbon footprint
  • fossil fuels
  • cost-effective
  • safety risks
  • greenhouse gas emissions
  • environmental sustainability
  • optimal solution
  • advancement
  • renewable energy sources
  • viable
  • eco-friendly
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