IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The given graph shows the main sources of energy for USA in 1980 and 1990.

The given graph shows the main sources of energy for USA in 1980 and 1990.
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The given pie charts illustrate
types
Correct article usage
the types
show examples
 of five main sources of
energy
Use synonyms
, namely, oil, natural gas, coal, hydroelectric and nuclear
power
Use synonyms
, in the USA in 1980 and 1990.
Overall
Linking Words
, what stands out from the charts is that
while
Linking Words
 oil was the main source of
energy
Use synonyms
 in
both
Use synonyms
 two years, that for hydroelectric
power
Use synonyms
 ranked
last
Linking Words
. With regard to the charts, the
energy
Use synonyms
 produced by oil experienced a significant decrease from 42% to 33%. Natural gas
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
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accounted for almost a quarter of the
energy
Use synonyms
 use in 1980 before experiencing a small decline to 25%
with
Change preposition
apply
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ranking third in 1990. Hydroelectric
power
Use synonyms
 remained
both
Use synonyms
 the same and the least used
energy
Use synonyms
 source in
both
Use synonyms
 years with
at
Change preposition
apply
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5%. Focusing on
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
 two sources,
both
Use synonyms
 coal and nuclear
power
Use synonyms
 use saw an increase.
While
Linking Words
 the former doubled from 5% to 10% in a decade, the latter rose from a little less than a quarter to 27%.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words energy, power, both with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "give" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 3 times.
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