Some people think that consumerism can boost the economy and create business and jobs. Others consider that society becomes a ‘ throw-away society’ producing unnecessary waste. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Some
people
argue that the majority of consumption can contribute to an
economic growth and create more employment opportunities, Remove the article
apply
while
the opponents of this
concept take the view that producing unnecessary waste can result in a throw-away society. Although
consumerism can help the growth of economy
and Add an article
the economy
creating
more job places, I believe that Wrong verb form
create
overconsumption
has detrimental effects on the
society and the environment.
On the Correct article usage
apply
one
hand, most people
consider that the economy can be enhanced on a significant scale by consuming more products. If people
purchase more items and things from any markets
, it can result in more revenue. In Fix the agreement mistake
market
this
way, businesses can widen their chains to the whole area, maybe to the all country. For instance
, in my city, one
shop, "Al market
", has drawn Capitalize word
Market
the
significant number of consumers. Correct article usage
a
Hence
, after gaining the
significant amount of money, the boss of Correct article usage
a
this
shop has decided to create chains, and in this
way, they offered more employment opportunities for people
.
On the other hand
, some consider that overconsumption
is indeed more harmful for
both the community and the nature. If Change the preposition
to
overconsumption
is observed in one
certain area, it means that a glut of products will be thrown to streets
because not all of them might be necessary items for Correct article usage
the streets
the
use. Correct article usage
apply
Moreover
, it can lead to a reduction in natural demands. Take Madrid as an example. In one
year, the consumption of some products has increased on a considerable scale, and it has ended with a dearth of main sources, including food, water, and other things.
In conclusion, while
the
production growth can be beneficial for businesses in terms of boosting the economy and generating more employment places, I consider that the potential drawbacks of Correct article usage
apply
overconsumption
such
as a reduction in the number of essential living demands cannot be ignored.Submitted by writingbhos on
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Task Achievement
To improve your score in Task Achievement, ensure that your essay directly responds to all aspects of the prompt. Consider comparing the views more directly and elaborating on how each view impacts society differently.
Coherence & Cohesion
For Coherence and Cohesion, try linking your main ideas more explicitly back to the thesis throughout the body of the essay. Use a variety of transition words and phrases to enhance the flow of your ideas.
Linguistic Range
Integrate more varied and complex sentence structures and vocabulary to enrich your arguments. This will not only make your essay more engaging but also demonstrate a higher level of language proficiency.