in some countries,more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exersice classses what are the reasons for this? is this a positive or negative development?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Thanks to some cultural and personal
reasons
, many
people
have been
practicing
Change the spelling
practising
show examples
sports in their own homes with their own professional
trainers
. There might be a variety of
reasons
for it. It seems to me that there could be both positive and negative sides to it. There are several
reasons
why some prefer to improve their
fitness
level
with their own
trainers
.
Firstly
, the intentions of
people
who are hiring professionals.
Furthermore
, one-on-one training provides
people
with not only the best exercise skills
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
but
also
health and
lifestyle
advice. Because of these
reasons
, nowadays, it has become quite common to hire your own
trainers
. Some Hollywood celebrities or wealthy
people
could be a clear example of it.
Moreover
, in some cultures, women are not allowed to visit gyms.
Whereas
, why want to be fit and learn how to live a healthy
lifestyle
? In that condition,
this
trend allows them to be fitter and more stunning.
Finally
, a lack of motivation is
also
a problem for some
people
. What I mean by
this
is that some
people
who want to be more Georgian often ask for advice or help from their friends or colleagues. But their advice or past experience might cause a person`s demotivation. Coaches keep them motivated and help them to achieve their target
fitness
level
. Working with a personal coach is a positive trend, as it offers many chances to lose weight in a short time.
Firstly
,
titness
Correct your spelling
fitness
tightness
is not only doing some exercise, but it
also
allows
people
to find their proper diet plans and a fruitful daily routine. Since personal
trainers
always control
people
`s lifestyles, their adoption of
this
kind of
lifestyle
might be easier, and they can easily engage.
Secondly
, motivation and a special plan will be able to play an important role in
this
situation.
Meaning
Wrong verb form
This means
show examples
that if
people
join a gym, they might not have any target
level
, and they might go there and do random exercises.
On the contrary
, with a personal trainer, they will have a clear timetable, which allows them to lose weight in the correct way even though they are living a hectic
lifestyle
. In conclusion, some use
fitness
trainers
and coaches to achieve their target
fitness
level
and not lose motivation
. .
Replace the punctuation
.
...
show examples
It seems to me that it helps
people
reach their
goal
Fix the agreement mistake
goals
show examples
in a straight way
Submitted by temurbekberdiyev78 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Coherence & Cohesion
Ensure a clear and coherent structure throughout your essay, using paragraphs effectively to distinguish between your ideas.
Coherence & Cohesion
Begin with a clear introduction that addresses the question directly and ends with a conclusion that summarizes your main points.
Task Achievement
Develop your main points by providing more specific examples and elaborations to make your argument stronger.
Task Achievement
Try to more directly address the question's two parts: the reasons for the trend and its positive or negative developments, ensuring you elaborate on both equally.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: