IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

A rise in the standard of living in a country often only seems to benefit cities rather than rural areas. What problems can this cause? How might these problems be reduced?

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Developments in certain
life
Use synonyms
 conditions tend not to evolve
small
Change preposition
in small
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places
Use synonyms
 but improve locations with high
population
Fix the agreement mistake
populations
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 and
this
Linking Words
 not only causes big standard gaps in that country
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 but
also
Linking Words
 creates uneven tax expenditures. In order to solve these problems, the government of that nation ought to spend more on rural
places
Use synonyms
 and locate some main buildings there.
Level
Correct article usage
The level
show examples
 of living is increasing faster and faster in crowded
areas
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,
such
Linking Words
 as capitals
an
Correct your spelling
and
show examples
 big cities,
while
Linking Words
 it is behind the current
life
Use synonyms
 standards in
places
Use synonyms
 with low population and
this
Linking Words
 causes uneven development rates and it violates
right
Correct article usage
the right
show examples
 to receive service from the government in change with payments comes from citizens. Humans pay
tax
Fix the agreement mistake
taxes
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 to their governments so that they can use public developments but
as a result
Linking Words
 of big cities consuming much higher money rates, ones in small
areas
Use synonyms
 cannot meet
benefits
Correct article usage
the benefits
show examples
 of the money they pay. Another problem is uneven development rates in that country which causes
life
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 difficulties.
For example
Linking Words
, individuals do not have the opportunity to solve their daily issues in small
places
Use synonyms
,
when
Correct word choice
while
show examples
 citizens in big
centers
Change the spelling
centres
show examples
 can even automatize it by using certain services. Going to a hospital or an emergency place,
for instance
Linking Words
, may need more time than it should be in undeveloped locations and
this
Linking Words
 might have results that no one should ever have to experience just because of the poor governance. Ones that
supposed
Add a missing verb
are supposed
show examples
 to serve
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the citizens should implement certain economic plans
that
Linking Words
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 eligible to improve
life
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 conditions in low-populated
areas
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. By doing
this
Linking Words
, men and women can have the service they spend their money on. Certain buildings and
centers
Change the spelling
centres
show examples
 can be built
Change preposition
apply
show examples
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
to make a small place more live and ready to meet individual’s needs as it should be. Opening cinemas or organizing certain festivals
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
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 ones from other locations come to least developed
places
Use synonyms
 and by doing
this
Linking Words
 a more humanitarian
life
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 can be created.
To conclude
Linking Words
, to prevent implications caused by development lack and to ensure tax safety,
life
Use synonyms
 standard rises should be enforced
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
 undeveloped
areas
Use synonyms
as well as
Linking Words
 big cities and
this
Linking Words
 can be done by budget planning for improvement and locating certain
places
Use synonyms
 into those
areas
Use synonyms
.

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Task Achievement
Ensure a clear introduction that outlines the main points to be discussed. This sets a strong foundation for your essay.
Task Achievement
Develop your main ideas with more detailed and specific examples. This helps to support your arguments and makes your essay more persuasive.
Coherence and Cohesion
Use clear topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph. This makes your main ideas immediately clear to the reader and enhances the structure of your essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
Enhance the logical flow between sentences and paragraphs. Using transition words and phrases can help to guide the reader through your arguments smoothly.
Coherence and Cohesion
Conclude your essay by summarizing the main points and stating your opinion or recommendation clearly. This reinforces your argument and provides a strong ending.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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