Many people believe that the government should allocate more funding to the arts, such as music, painting, and theatre. Others argue that this money should be spent on more essential sectors like healthcare, education, and infrastructure. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #government #arts #music #theatre #money #sectors #healthcare #education #infrastructure

It is argued that many individuals believe that the

government

should provide more

funds

to the arts, like music, painting, and theatre.

Whereas

, others claim that

this

fund should be spent on indispensable sectors like healthcare,

education

, and

infrastructure

. I believe

due to

overpopulation

government

should invest

funds

in healthcare,

education

, and

infrastructure

. On the one hand, people have busy schedules that impact on personal lives

as well as

mental

health

. To explain it, nowadays many individuals have to spend their time on work, so they cannot give their time to family and

due to

overwork and exhaust ramification mental

health

problems which result from the

government

spending

funds

on arts so that they can spend time with their family that improve their personal life and mental fitness.

On the other hand

due to

overpopulation many demands related to major sectors like

health

education

, and

infrastructure

have risen. People's essential needs are good

health

, proper

education

, and housing which are hard to get

due to

over masses so the

government

should make a strategy to solve these problems for their citizens to get proper facilities related to these factors.

For instance

, America had to cut off military

funds

to fulfil their residence demands. They had to invest those

funds

in colleges, hospitals, and buildings so that they could get

health

and

education

facilities and they built buildings for residence for proper livelihood. In conclusion, the

government

should invest

funds

in major essential sectors like

health

education

, and

infrastructure

rather than investing in arts because of overpopulation so that every individual can get proper facilities which are more essential to achieve the quality of life.

Submitted by prashant.pun2076 on Mon Feb 26 2024

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Coherence and Cohesion

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

274 words

7.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Many people believe that the government should allocate more funding to the arts, such as music, painting, and theatre. Others argue that this money should be spent on more essential sectors like healthcare, education, and infrastructure. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Global warming is one of the biggest threats humans face in the 21st Century, and sea levels continue to rise at alarming rates. What problems are associated with this, and what are some possible solutions?

Many manufactured food and drinks contain high level of sugars which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

Children are generally more successful in foreign language studies than adults. Thus, it is better to learn languages in childhood. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some people believe that all jobs will be done by artificially intelligent machines. What is your opinion?

There is a good deal of evidence that increasing car use is contributing to global warming and having other undesirable effects on people's health and well-being. What can be done to discourage people from using their car?