Some people think that parents should teach children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the place to learn this.
It is argued that few individuals believe
parents
are responsible for teaching their children
to become good members
of society
. However
, others claim the school
is the place to learn about this
. I agree with the former point of view because children
's behaviour reflects that of their parents
.
On the one hand, Children
's behaviour reflects that of their parents
. Parents
are the first teachers of their offerings and they watch and learn how their parents
act. For example
, if parents
respect other people who live next door, and they speak politely and bow to elders then
their children
also
learn to respect others and speak politely. Therefore
, parents
are responsible to teach
their Change preposition
for teaching
children
to be good members
of society
.
On the other hand
, school
teach Fix the agreement mistake
schools
children
subject
like social and moral education. Correct subject-verb agreement
subjects
School
contains many subjects to teach children
that include social and moral education, and have some social activities. But however
, having these subjects and social activities doesn’t make children
good members
of society
, if they lack social norms and values. So, School
is a place to explore student their
abilities and it leads them to become successful Correct pronoun usage
apply
person
in future but being Fix the agreement mistake
people
success
doesn’t make good Replace the word
successful
members
of society
.
In Conclusion, parents
are responsible for teaching their offerings to become good members
of society
, because they are the first teachers to their children
so they should teach them social norms and values, respect and speak politely with others. Then
their children
will become good members
of society
.Submitted by prashant.pun2076 on
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task response
Begin by addressing the task more explicitly in your introduction. Clearly state your thesis and outline the main points that will be discussed. This sets a strong foundation for your essay.
coherence and cohesion
Incorporate a wider range of linking words and phrases to improve the flow of your essay. Also, ensure each paragraph starts with a clear topic sentence that signals the main idea to the reader.
task achievement
Support your arguments with more specific examples and details. For instance, when mentioning the role of parents or schools in shaping children, include real-life examples or studies that highlight their impact.
coherence and cohesion
Be mindful of repetition in your essay. Avoid using the same phrases or ideas multiple times. Instead, try to introduce new information or perspectives in each paragraph to keep the reader engaged.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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