In some place old age is valued, while in other cultures youth is considered more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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While
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in certain regions, older
people
Use synonyms
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
considered more
value
Replace the word
valuable
show examples
than the young, many others say the opposite. It is
this
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writer
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writer's
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opinion that
support
Verb problem
apply
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the benefits
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
youngster
Fix the agreement mistake
youngsters
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are greater than the old because of
the
Change the word
their
show examples
capability and modern knowledge despite being inexperienced. The most important factor
to judge
Change preposition
in judging
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the role of a person is the ability
contributing
Change the verb form
to contribute
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to building
the
Correct article usage
apply
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society. The young
age
Use synonyms
has the advantage of strength and techniques which is essential to various
of
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apply
show examples
sectors
such
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as engineering. Take
receptionist
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receptionists
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for example
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,
people
Use synonyms
nowadays prefer them to be active and energetic
while
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working, those are the characteristics that only the young have.
Thus
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the younger
age
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has the capability to achieve more
works
Fix the agreement mistake
work
show examples
for the community. Another point worth mentioning is that the information that
adolescent
Fix the agreement mistake
adolescents
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have is up-to-date and the technology
is
Verb problem
apply
show examples
also
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provided
Wrong verb form
provides
show examples
more value. Over the years, the information has been conducted and adjusted to benefit humanity, and the
principal
Correct your spelling
principle
show examples
to use
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of using
show examples
it changed.
Therefore
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,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
young
adult
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adults
show examples
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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more reliable for working with newly developed technology because they learn faster than
the
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apply
show examples
old
people
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. For
instant
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instance
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, flying an aircraft has always been a challenge for all
Use synonyms
age
Fix the agreement mistake
ages
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, but pilots
aging
Replace the word
aged
show examples
from 30 to 40 are more likely to take the job because it is more complicated and demanding than
the
Change preposition
in the
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past.
Thus
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, the role of
adolescent
Add an article
the adolescent
an adolescent
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is more vital
due to
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their adaptability.
However
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, many cultures assume
the
Correct your spelling
that
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old
people
Use synonyms
hold
Verb problem
have
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a significant number of
experience
Fix the agreement mistake
experiences
show examples
which no young adult has.
This
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is true to some extent, but if they do not have the energy to do anything related to their enormous knowledge, the experience is not so helpful at all.
Moreover
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, skills from books and the internet shared by professionals may
far
Add a missing verb
be far
show examples
useful
Correct quantifier usage
more useful
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than the veterans’ and can be obtained by young
people
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, old
people
Use synonyms
have the knowledge and experience much greater than the young, but the younger
age
Use synonyms
has the advantage of health and technology. Henceforth,
adolescent
Fix the agreement mistake
adolescents
show examples
have a more valuable role in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society.

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task achievement
Consider thoroughly developing both views before stating your opinion, to ensure balanced discussion of the topic.
task achievement
Support your points with specific, real-world examples to strengthen your argument and make it more convincing.
coherence and cohesion
Enhance logical flow by using a wider range of linking words and phrases to connect your ideas more smoothly.
linguistic accuracy
Proofread your essay to correct grammatical mistakes and improve your range of vocabulary.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • wisdom
  • respected
  • accumulated
  • heritage
  • patriarchs
  • matriarchs
  • innovation
  • adaptability
  • trends
  • dynamic
  • heritage
  • progress
  • continuity
  • traditions
  • harmonious
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