IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

In the past, when students did a university degree, they tended to study in their own country. Nowadays, they have more opportunity to study abroad. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this development? Use your own ideas, knowledge and experience to support your arguments

#students #university #study #country #opportunity #development #support #arguments
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In the past, when students did a university degree, they tended to study in their own country. Nowadays, they have more
opportunity
Fix the agreement mistake
opportunities
show examples
 to study abroad. What are the advantages and disadvantages of
this
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 development? Use your own ideas, knowledge and experience to support your arguments There is no objective fact that -------------------------- View is widespread in our reality because of its importance. Most people agree with
this
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 statement because of its many benefits.
However
Linking Words
, some of the people first mention its problems. My next paragraphs will discuss the causes of the problem and suggest possible solutions. 49 Describing the different types of problems, the first and foremost problem is that ------------------- Example:- --------------- -. Another drawback that may come to people's mind may be --------------------. To give an example -------------------------------- So there are many that type of problems in our reality but now I would like to discuss my next paragraph 49 On its darker side, there are some flaws that make it problematic and worrying, I would like to first highlight the most suitable proposed solution ---------------------------- - ----------.
For example
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, ---------------------------------- . I think there are many solutions of
this
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 kind, and we can talk about
this
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 topic all the time. So I want to discuss my next paragraph about concluding. 54
Submitted by zohrab-gevorgyan on

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introduction
The essay lacks a clear structure, as it starts with a very vague introduction without directly addressing the topic of the advantages and disadvantages of studying abroad. It's crucial to begin with a clear thesis statement that directly responds to the question posed.
body
The body paragraphs are filled with placeholders (e.g., '---------------------------', 'Example:- ---------------'), which indicates that there are neither developed ideas nor specific examples. Concrete examples are essential for supporting your arguments and making your essay persuasive.
structure
There's a failure to clearly differentiate between the advantages and disadvantages of the topic. Your essay should have distinct sections that separately address the benefits and drawbacks to ensure the reader can easily follow your arguments.
conclusion
The conclusion is missing a summary of the arguments made, which leaves the essay without a clear resolution. Each essay should include a conclusion that summarizes the main points and reinforces your position on the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Globalization
  • Cultural assimilation
  • Academic mobility
  • Cross-cultural
  • Language proficiency
  • Internationalization of education
  • Diaspora
  • Expat community
  • Pedagogic methodologies
  • Cultural literacy
  • Foreign academic credentials
  • Educational disparity
  • Repatriation
  • Xenophobia
  • Ethnocentric perspectives
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