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Band 5

International travel is becoming cheaper, and countries are opening their doors to more and more tourists. Do the advantages of increased tourism outweigh its disadvantages.

#travel #countries #doors #tourists #tourism
There is an argumentative phenomenon sparking a debate over a travel-related issue, whether cross-bordered tourism is not prohibitive anymore, so there
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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 an ever-increasing number of holidaymakers to several outbound nations.
While
this
 reality has both merits and demerits, I would contend that its disadvantages may overshadow its counterparts. Without a shadow of a doubt, the great hiking number of foreign travellers may immensely bring about positive effects on a country, especially in terms of domestic citizens’ income. Being aware of the affordable price of nowadays international tours, a tourism-appealing area can easily maximize their profits to become as lucrative as possible by promptly creating numerous vocational opportunities for local dwellers to be employed. To be more precise, in Sapa-
a Vietnamese tourist attractions
Correct the article-noun agreement
Vietnamese tourist attractions
a Vietnamese tourist attraction
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, there are more and more staying hotels, and luxurious resorts being constructed to meet the demand of outbound visitors. By doing so, the unique destination can not only draw appealings of more travellers from other continents but
also
 help ethnic minorities namely Thai and H’mong have
accessibility
Replace the word
access
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 to a line of
career
Fix the agreement mistake
careers
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 to make a living and improve their destitute living
condition
Fix the agreement mistake
conditions
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.
Hence
, there is a wealth of beneficiaries from the fact that cross-bordered
visit
Fix the agreement mistake
visits
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is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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 more accessible.
While
 the redeeming features of
such
industry
Correct article usage
an industry
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 are widely acknowledged, its downsides still linger.
In other words
, an explosion in the number of individuals travelling abroad means that there are more flights needed, which may greatly contribute to environmental degradation, particularly the deteriorated quality of air. Undoubtedly,
airplanes’
Change the spelling
aeroplanes’
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 consumed amount of fuel is comparatively high in comparison to any means of transportation, so they will emit an uncountable volume of carbon footprint to the living habitat and create air pollution.
For instance
, in Vietnam, hundreds of daily flying trips to other countries from nationally acclaimed firms like Vietnam Airlines or Bamboo Airways may act as a main disturbance to
the
Correct article usage
apply
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environmental health.
Thus
, the increasing data of international travellers may exacerbate the surrounding environment . In conclusion,
while
 ordinary dwellers can vividly see the advantages of the mentioned phenomenon, it is
also
 essential to note that if high-ranking bureaucrats do not find an effective solution to preserve the health of the environment,
this
 rising industry may do more harm than good.
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task achievement
Ensure a clear thesis statement in the introduction to directly answer the essay question. This will improve the clarity of your position throughout the essay.
task achievement
Develop paragraphs with a single idea, supported by specific examples. Each paragraph should start with a clear topic sentence, followed by explanation, example, and a concluding sentence if necessary.
coherence cohesion
Use a wider range of linking words and phrases to improve the flow between sentences and paragraphs. This will enhance the essay's coherence.
coherence cohesion
Avoid overly long sentences as they can make your argument difficult to follow. Break them into shorter, more manageable ones.
coherence cohesion
Review your essay for any grammatical errors or typos. Accurate language use will contribute to a clearer presentation of ideas.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • GDP (Gross Domestic Product)
  • local businesses
  • job creation
  • cultural understanding
  • stereotypes
  • global connections
  • infrastructure
  • public transportation
  • environmental degradation
  • pollution
  • deforestation
  • wildlife habitats
  • commercialization
  • cultural identity
  • overcrowding
  • quality of life
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