In the world so many different types of the music. For what we need music? Is the traditional music of country more important than the international music that is heard everywhere nowadays?
For
me
Add a comma
me,
music
is so important
phenomenonCorrect article usage
an important
of
my life. Because for me Change preposition
in
music
give
me the atmosphere of the situations and give Change the verb form
gives
motivation
to do something. Correct pronoun usage
me motivation
For example
when l fell
Correct your spelling
feel
sadly
Change the word
sad
the
good, positive Correct article usage
apply
music
up my mood its
seems with good mood when l Correct pronoun usage
It
herd
to sadly Correct your spelling
heard
music
fell upset.
One of the widely discussed issues nowadays is why traditional
Correct article usage
the traditional
music
of a country more
important than Add a missing verb
is more
the
international Correct article usage
apply
music
?
I think Change the punctuation
.
music
define don’t
choose the age of people. Wrong verb form
doesn’t
Nonetheless
Add a comma
,
its
Correct pronoun usage
it
depend
Correct subject-verb agreement
depends
to
generation. I support the second view Change preposition
on
international
Change preposition
of international
music
.
The first view is traditional music
. Traditional music
makes up with our history This
types of music
describe our tradition and ethnicity . Traditional music
remind
our history Change the verb form
reminds
likewise
the main role of the country. For example
in
Kazakh traditional Change preposition
apply
music
describe
situation of war and so on
The second view is international Correct subject-verb agreement
describes
music
. I so
interested Add a missing verb
am so
with
Change preposition
in
those kind
of Change the determiner
that kind
those kinds
music
. International music
describe
Change the verb form
describes
during
the period or situation. Change preposition
apply
In
Change preposition
This
this
kind of music
tell
all the normal Correct subject-verb agreement
tells
notion
. But if you attention most of the singers or rappers write the song with Fix the agreement mistake
notions
there
own life. Correct your spelling
their
For example
Eminem. Eminem in your song tell
about our difficult life
Both of Correct subject-verb agreement
tells
this topic
Fix the agreement mistake
these topics
interesting
and more popular Add a missing verb
are interesting
medium
Fix the agreement mistake
mediums
of
people. But for me interesting topic Change preposition
for
international
Add a missing verb
is international
music
. I always listen
international Add the preposition
listen to
music
and its more
closer Change the word
apply
my
heartChange preposition
to my
Submitted by dnm.best on
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- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
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- Sentence 3 - Discussion
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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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