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Band 5.5

When children start school, teachers have more influence on their intellectual and social development than their parent. To what extent do you agree or disagree

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Parents
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 send their
children
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 to study at school and often rely upon their
teachers
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 when it
come
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comes
show examples
 to their growth. They argue that when
children
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 are studying there,
teachers
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 are more influential on their intellectual and social development, compared to their
parents
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. I partly agree with
this
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 stance and think that both
parents
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 and
teachers
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 have their own influences on
students
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' skills and social development.
To begin
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 with,
teachers
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 develop
students
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' cognitive and social
aspect
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aspects
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 academically. They are authorised to assign their
students
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with
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apply
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many things in order to teach them how to learn and how to interact with others.
For example
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, a
kinder garten
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kindergarten
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 teacher
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explains
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explain
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explains
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the
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them
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 to their
students
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 about animals, which can develop a broader knowledge, and later puts them in
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groups
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group
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groups
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 to discuss animal
habitants
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habitats
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, which can improve
students
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' teamwork aspect.
However
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, when the
students
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 go back home,
teachers
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 will no longer have
an
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apply
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access to monitor them.
In other words
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,
teacher
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the teacher
a teacher
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 can only help no more than with their academic achievements.
Therefore
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,
parents
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 are responsible
to extend
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for extending
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 their intellectual and social development at home.
This
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 is because studying is not limited
by
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to
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 schooling only.
Thus
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, to optimise
children
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's academic
inteligence
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intelligence
,
parents
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 can help
students
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 with their homework.
Futhermore
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Furthermore
, social awareness can be taught by
parents
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,
such
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 as holding a family gathering, bringing their
children
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 to a playground, and simply going on a trip. With these actions being taken, the young can gain the most out of their potential.
To sum up
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, sending
children
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 to school does not mean that
teacher
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the teacher
show examples
 is the only driver to enrich
students
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' cognitive and social skills.
Instead
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,
teachers
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 and
parents
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 should cooperate to produce a
knowledgable
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knowledgeable
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 generation.

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task achievement
Ensure a balanced approach to your essay by fully addressing the prompt's extent and providing a clear thesis statement that guides the reader through your argument.
task achievement
Develop your main points with specific, detailed examples that support your argument. Incorporating real-life scenarios or studies can strengthen your position.
coherence cohesion
Make sure to transition smoothly between paragraphs and within paragraphs to enhance the flow of your essay. Using a variety of transition words and phrases can significantly improve coherence.
coherence cohesion
Check for consistent spelling, especially with subject-specific terminology or repeated words. Accurate spelling aids in clarity and professionalism of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Remember to proofread your essay for grammatical errors and ensure sentence structures vary to maintain reader interest and clarity of your points.
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