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Writing Samples
Band 5

Many young people choose to take a year out between finishing school and starting university in order to gain work experience or to travel. The experience of non-academic life benefits the individual when they return to education. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Lately, the argument around whether a student should take a spare
year
Use synonyms
 between
highschool
Correct your spelling
high school
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 and university has been ignited by a lot of individuals. Some people ponder that the gap
year
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 has no impact but only the benefit,
conversely
Linking Words
, others believe that
this
Linking Words
 span of
time
Use synonyms
 is just a waste of
time
Use synonyms
. Personally, I reckon that to have an unoccupied
year
Use synonyms
 after school is a very good decision, as I explain below.
Firstly
Linking Words
, when
the
Correct article usage
apply
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teenagers graduate from
the
Correct article usage
apply
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school, they usually are in their 17s or 18s, which seems a very young age for
any one
Correct your spelling
anyone
show examples
 to
decide
Verb problem
make
show examples
 some crucial choices. Meanwhile, taking a gap
year
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 can assist a youngster to recognize himself or herself, and to realize what he or she definitely desires to do. A vast amount of students apply to university for their
bachelor
Change noun form
bachelor's
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 degree when they are not mature enough.
For instance
Linking Words
, working or
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
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 for a
year
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 after
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
long lasting
Add a hyphen
long-lasting
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 school
preparations
Fix the agreement mistake
preparation
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,
Remove the comma
apply
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initially
Linking Words
 can create a strong background for a prospective scholar.
Linking Words
Also
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Also,
show examples
this
Linking Words
 can perk some for superior experiences.
In contrast
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, a part of people
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
do not agree with the theory
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that is
Verb problem
apply
show examples
given above. They mainly insist that
this
Linking Words
 free
year
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, even though it can be privileged, still must be skipped, since it is just a waste of
time
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that is
Linking Words
 very necessary for each individual
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 because it doesn’t matter how old you are, just a
year
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 will not make a difference in someone's maturity - they think.
To sum up
Linking Words
, I agree that the spare
year
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 is something that each student needs, as it is the main period of
time
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 when they are being built emotionally
as well as
Linking Words
 physically. So if anyone doubts about the decisions they have to take for their degree programs, I assume they ought to have just a small
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
year
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-long bridge to rest and contemplate for some
time
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.

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task achievement
Ensure a more balanced development of your argument by providing equal discussion on both viewpoints before stating your conclusion. This helps in achieving a more complete response to the task.
task achievement
Introduce specific examples from real-life scenarios or studies to strengthen your arguments. This could involve personal experiences, statistical data, or observations that relate directly to the benefits of taking a gap year.
coherence cohesion
Work on the logical structure of your essay by maintaining a more focused and organized approach throughout. Make sure each paragraph serves a clear purpose and builds on the previous point effectively.
coherence cohesion
Improve the introduction and conclusion by clearly stating your stance in the introduction and summarizing your main points in the conclusion. This reinforces the essay's structure and your viewpoint.
coherence cohesion
Use cohesive devices more effectively to link ideas across sentences and paragraphs. Examples include transition words (furthermore, however, therefore) and referencing (this, such, it). These elements enhance the flow and clarity of your writing.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Gap year
  • Non-academic life
  • Resume
  • Job market
  • Personal development
  • Broaden their worldviews
  • Academic pressures
  • Renewed focus
  • Loss of academic momentum
  • Career goals
  • Informed decisions
  • Soft skills
  • Communication
  • Problem-solving
  • Adaptability
  • Financial burden
  • Prolonged break
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