Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situation. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Although
some suppose that
people
should tolerate
unwelcommed
Correct your spelling
unwelcomed
unwelcome
events
such
as job dissatisfaction and money
deficite
Correct your spelling
deficit
deficits
, there is an idea, and it is
also
in my favour, that individuals should not accept their
problems
and try to find a solution. In the following essay, I will discuss both sides,and I will
also
express my opinion. On the one hand, some
blieve
Correct your spelling
believe
that
people
should endure unfortunate events
such
as an unfavourable job or being limited
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
spending.
Firstly
, the main benefit of
this
acceptance is contentment and
reduce
Wrong verb form
reduced
show examples
stress. In today's hectic life,
people
are trying to earn more and more money, and
this
can lead to a lot of pressure and strain on personal life.
People
can enjoy their moments when they are not worried about more achievements.
Secondly
, enduring adverse
sitatuations
Correct your spelling
situations
situation
could lead to developing
resiliense
Correct your spelling
resilience
resiliency
and character.
People
can learn patience when they are experiencing unwanted circumstances, leading to better
personality
Fix the agreement mistake
personalities
show examples
and
characteristic
Fix the agreement mistake
characteristics
show examples
.
On the other hand
, there is another
iadea
Correct your spelling
idea
, which I
also
side with, that
people
should not
accpet
Correct your spelling
accept
their unfavourite situations, and try to solve them. Striving for better situations can act as
catalyst
Add an article
a catalyst
show examples
for career advancement and financial stability. Those who choose to fight for their goals and targets
instead
of wasting time will experience success and prosperity. To take Iran as an example, many programmers start their
career
Fix the agreement mistake
careers
show examples
as interns with low salaries
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
and try to gain experience and expertise. After a few years, they will be promoted to
juniour
Correct your spelling
junior
engineers with considerable wages.
To sum up
,
while
some
people
claim that
problems
such
as an unacceptable job or being limited
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
spending, others maintain that
people
shoud
Correct your spelling
should
take
actions
Fix the agreement mistake
action
show examples
to address their
problems
.
Nevertheless
, I agree with the second group because of achieving the goals and targets after tackling the
problems
.
Submitted by sobi on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Consider using a wider variety of sentence structures to enhance clarity and cohesion in your writing. Complex sentences and varied transitional phrases can help to better connect your ideas and make your arguments more compelling.
task achievement
To improve task achievement, ensure your examples are directly related to the points you’re making and explicitly explain how these examples support your argument. This specificity will make your essay more persuasive and coherent.
coherence cohesion
Work on proofreading your essay to correct minor spelling and grammar errors, as these can distract from your message and affect the clarity of your ideas. An essay that reads smoothly is more likely to fully convey its argument to the reader.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Contentment
  • Resilience
  • Personal growth
  • Endurance
  • Initiative
  • Advancement
  • Catalyst
  • Financial stability
  • Status quo
  • Innovation
  • Missed opportunities
  • Life satisfaction
  • Adverse situations
  • Taking control
  • Risk assessment
  • Change management
  • Self-improvement
  • Motivation
  • Stagnation
  • Proactivity
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!