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Band 3

Changes in Felixstone in the UK between 1967 and 2001

#changes #felixstone #uk
The maps illustrate the changes in the Felix Stone area over a 34-year period, from 1980 to 2005. It can be seen on the map that Felix Stone witnessed a striking transformation. Most
noticeably
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noticeable
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,
the
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is the
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 elimination of the farmland. Looking at the picture in detail, one can see that the farmland in the northeastern corner was turned into a large entertainment complex with a swimming pool, a hotel, and two tennis courts. The fish market, the marine, and the pier system were completely demolished to make way for a private beach. Turning to the southwest of the map, many wind turbines were erected facing the sea.
Besides
, the cafe in the centre of the beach was still in the same place,
while
 a new parking lot was added next to the hotel to better cater to the accommodation needs of visitors.
Submitted by quynhtranhbh on

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task achievement
Ensure that the time frame in the introduction matches the task prompt. There was a discrepancy between the task (changes between 1967 and 2001) and your essay (1980 to 2005).
coherence cohesion
Include an opening sentence in your essay that directly addresses the topic and sets the context for the reader.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that your essay has a clear conclusion that summarizes the main changes or highlights the most significant transformation.
coherence cohesion
Make your descriptions clearer by using a wider range of transition words to show changes over time and the relationship between different parts of your description.
task achievement
Integrate specific details about the changes without making general statements. Mention dates, sizes, or the significance of the changes wherever possible.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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