These days too many people maintain their health by relying on doctors and medicine, rather than by following a healthy lifestyle. To what extent to you agree with this statement.

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Nowadays a majority of individuals
maintaining
Wrong verb form
maintain
show examples
their
overall
Linking Words
-
well being
Add a hyphen
well-being
show examples
by relying on on healthcare workers and
medicine
Use synonyms
, rather than following a healthy
lifestyle
Use synonyms
.
while
Linking Words
there
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
some truth to
this
Linking Words
belief, I would partly agree with
this
Linking Words
point of view for some sound reasons.
Such
Linking Words
as
keep
Wrong verb form
keeping
show examples
Use synonyms
Correct article usage
a health
show examples
health
Replace the word
healthy
show examples
lifestyle
Use synonyms
beneficial
Add a missing verb
is beneficial
show examples
for
humans
Use synonyms
different
Change preposition
in different
show examples
ways .
However
Linking Words
,
doctors
Use synonyms
and
medicine
Use synonyms
crucial
role
Fix the agreement mistake
roles
show examples
during
Change preposition
in
show examples
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
lifetime
Replace the word
lives
show examples
. From one perspective,many people
containing
Verb problem
have
show examples
Use synonyms
Correct article usage
a health
show examples
health
Replace the word
healthy
show examples
lifestyle
Use synonyms
through engaging variety
Change preposition
of sport
show examples
sport
Change the noun form
sports
show examples
activities or regularly following
diet
Correct article usage
a diet
show examples
and
leave
Wrong verb form
leaving
show examples
bad eating habits.To explain, these days
humans
Use synonyms
adapting
Correct your spelling
adopting
show examples
Replace the word
healthy
show examples
health
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
lifestyle
Fix the agreement mistake
lifestyles
show examples
such
Linking Words
as
change
Wrong verb form
changing
show examples
bad eating or
play
Wrong verb form
playing
show examples
sport
Change the noun form
sports
show examples
games
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
stay
Change the form of the verb
staying
show examples
active.
As a result
Linking Words
dicrease
Correct your spelling
decreased
health
Use synonyms
risks
Use synonyms
humans life
Fix the agreement mistake
human lives
show examples
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, that
contribute
Correct subject-verb agreement
contributes
show examples
eroding
Change preposition
to eroding
show examples
obesity problems among
youngers
Correct your spelling
youngsters
show examples
in society today. As
consequence
Correct article usage
a consequence
show examples
, individuals do not have to apply
doctors
Use synonyms
or medicines for their
health
Use synonyms
. From
other
Correct quantifier usage
another
show examples
perspective,
doctors
Use synonyms
and
medicine
Use synonyms
important
Add a missing verb
are important
show examples
in
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
lifetime
Replace the word
lives
show examples
because in different situations we need
doctors
Use synonyms
and
medicine
Use synonyms
.
Linking Words
Such as
Correct quantifier usage
As
show examples
recovering
diseases
Change preposition
from diseases
show examples
or
accidens
Correct your spelling
accidents
accident
time help us cause
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
that time we apply
Use synonyms
doctors
Change preposition
to doctors
show examples
.They help us
difficult
Change preposition
in difficult
show examples
situations like
injuring time
Wrong verb form
injury
show examples
treatment with
medicine
Use synonyms
.
For instance
Linking Words
,
according to
Linking Words
give report
Change preposition
on
show examples
healthcare
center
Fix the agreement mistake
centers
show examples
everyday
Replace the word
every day
show examples
about 35 per cent population
visiting
Wrong verb form
visit
show examples
hospitals and complain
various
Change preposition
about various
show examples
health
Use synonyms
problems.
Therefore
Linking Words
,we always
apply
Add the preposition
apply for
show examples
doctors
Use synonyms
and medicines during
lifetime
Correct pronoun usage
our lifetime
show examples
aslo
Correct your spelling
also
different
Change preposition
in different
show examples
situations. In conclusion,
while
Linking Words
maintaining
Use synonyms
Correct article usage
a health
show examples
health
Replace the word
healthy
show examples
lifestyle
Use synonyms
beneficial
Add a missing verb
is beneficial
show examples
Use synonyms
Change preposition
for humans
show examples
humans life
Fix the agreement mistake
human lives
show examples
but
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
doctors
Use synonyms
and medicines
essential
Add a missing verb
are essential
show examples
for
Use synonyms
Correct article usage
a health
show examples
health
Replace the word
healthy
show examples
lifestyle
Use synonyms
.
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coherence cohesion
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coherence cohesion
Structure your essay more effectively. Include clear topic sentences at the beginning of paragraphs and use linking words to improve the flow between ideas.
coherence cohesion
Ensure a clear stance in your introduction and a succinct summary of your main points in your conclusion. This strengthens the introduction and conclusion components of your essay.
task achievement
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Your opinion

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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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