Doing an enjoyable activity with a kid helps to improve your skills and it is beneficial than reading. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Currently, many
individuals
prefer to play interesting and enjoyable
activity
Fix the agreement mistake
activities
show examples
with a
child
Fix the infinitive
to helps
show examples
helps
Correct subject-verb agreement
help
show examples
to improve their skills and they think that many
activities
like outdoors are more creative than
studiying
Correct your spelling
studying
. I will declare both of them with relevant examples in my essay. From one perspective, carrying out an interesting activity with a
child
can improve their skills because I believe that playing
activities
like outdoors can
be lifts
Change the verb form
lift
show examples
the
child
's spirits. But you should
playing
Change the verb form
play
be playing
show examples
activities
with a
child
because
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
your kid can be bored alone and
this
helps you to erode your
nervous
Replace the word
nervousness
show examples
.
As a result
, carrying out
activities
with a
child
can
be affected
Wrong verb form
affect
show examples
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
her or his
future
.
Such
as, If you play games with your
child
more, it can be
usefull
Correct your spelling
useful
to your kid and
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
he
she
show examples
can become
talented
Add an article
a talented
the talented
show examples
person in the
future
.
Besides
that, your
child
would like to play games with you in his spare time, If you nurture him with patriotism.
Therefore
, I
regard
Verb problem
apply
show examples
this
Correct your spelling
think
show examples
doing
an
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
enjoyable
activities
with a
child
like outdoors can improve better skills.
Whereas
, many people believe that reading plays a pivotal role in the
individuals
' life than enjoyable
activities
because If you teach your
child
instead
of carrying out
activities
,
this
helps to improve their thinking ability.
As a result
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
adults can be
popular
Add an article
a popular
show examples
and active
person
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
in the
future
and lots of can be
honored
Change the spelling
honoured
show examples
your son If you teach your son since he was young.
Such
as, If you
do
Verb problem
play
show examples
games with your
child
, it can be
habit
Add an article
a habit
show examples
for him in the
future
. So I believe that many
individuals
should teach their children since they
was
Wrong verb form
are
show examples
young If the parents want
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
their children can be talented
person
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
in the
future
.
To conclude
, I hope that both doing
activities
and studying can be
Correct your spelling
useful
usefull
Correct your spelling
useful
for the
individuals'
Change noun form
individuals
show examples
child
Submitted by soglomovsarvar on

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Coherence & Cohesion
To improve your score, focus on constructing a clear and logical structure in your essay. Begin with an introductory paragraph that outlines your stance clearly. Use separate paragraphs to discuss each main point, ensuring a smooth transition between ideas.
Coherence & Cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion should clearly present your stance on the topic and succinctly summarize the main points of your argument. Ensure these sections are distinctly articulated to enhance the clarity of your essay.
Task Achievement
Support your arguments with specific, relevant examples. These examples should be detailed and clearly linked to the main points you are making. The use of more varied and precise examples will strengthen your argument and improve your essay's persuasiveness.
Task Achievement
To achieve a complete response, make sure to fully address all parts of the prompt. This involves discussing both sides of the argument to some extent and then clearly stating your own opinion. Keep your discussion focused and directly related to the prompt to improve this aspect.
Task Achievement
Work on presenting clear and comprehensive ideas. Each paragraph should focus on a single main point, explained and supported in detail. Try to improve the clarity of your thoughts by organizing them more logically and using clearer sentences.
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