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Band 5

The table gives information about enrollment of students in Manchester University in 1937, 1963 and 2017.

The table gives information about enrollment of students in Manchester University in 1937, 1963 and 2017.
#information #enrollment #students #manchester #university
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The table compares information about the
number
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 of new
students
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 who enrolled in
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the university
a university
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university
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University
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 of
Manchester
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 over 3 different years (1937,1967,2017).
Overall
Linking Words
,
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university
Correct article usage
the university
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 of
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manchester
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Manchester
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 has become more popular and global. In 1937, the
number
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 of new
students
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 who enrolled in the
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university
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University
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 of
mamnchester
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Manchester
 was( 327)which is much lower than the
number
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 of
students
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(1133) who enrolled
to
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on
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the university
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university
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University
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 of
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manchester
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Manchester
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 in 1967.
Moreover
Linking Words
,the
proprotion
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proportion
 of female
students
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 who enrolled
to
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at
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Add an article
the university
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university
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University
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 of
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manchester
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Manchester
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 in 2017 was (55%)
from
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of
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 the total
number
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 (6254).
Also
Linking Words
,the proportion of female
students
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 (45%)who enrolled
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University
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university
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 of
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manchester
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Manchester
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 in 1937 is much higher than the proportion of female
students
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 (35%)who enrolled
to
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at
show examples
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Add an article
the university
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university
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University
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 of
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manchester
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Manchester
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 in 1967. The highest proportion of
students
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 who came from within 40 miles of
Manchester
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 enrolled
to
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at
show examples
Use synonyms
Add an article
the university
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university
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University
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 of
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manchester
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Manchester
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 was 55% in 1937.
Submitted by suski205 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 71%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words number, students, university, manchester with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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