Some people believe that parents should devote more time to helping kids with school work, others think that they should allocate more time to play sports with their kids. Discuss the both these views and give your own opinion

Spending time with our
children
plays an essential role in all their
life
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lives
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.
While
some people argue that assisting
children
in academic tasks lies affirm foundation for their future success, some believe that dedicating more time
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
sports
activities
emphasise
Correct subject-verb agreement
emphasises
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more holistic development of
children
. In my point of view, I think that there should be a balance between educational and physical development
that
is
Verb problem
apply
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lead
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leads
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to comprehensive growth of a child. On the one hand, helping offspring in educational work
lead
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leads
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to a lot of positives in their future.
In other words
,
this
can instil discipline, responsibility and
strong
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a strong
show examples
work ethic in
children
.
Besides
, parents engaging actively in their
children
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children's
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education can identify learning difficulties early.
For example
, When the mother
teach
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teaches
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her child reading and
find
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finds
show examples
him
Correct pronoun usage
he
show examples
cannot read probably in spite of her repeated attempts, she
realized
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realises
show examples
that there is a problem.
As a result
, an instant procedure could be taken early to overcome
this
challenge. Because of all
pros
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the pros
show examples
of participating offspring in their educational journey, It is crucial for parents to support their
youngster
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youngsters
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early.
On the other hand
, Engaging
children
in
sports
activities
encourage
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encourages
show examples
many important skills
as well as
enhancing social communication. To illustrate
this
, playing
sports
gain significant skills
such
as teamwork
,
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apply
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builds relicense, good lifestyle.
In addition
to
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apply
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provide them with social skills to contribute to the emotional and psychological well-being of
children
.
For instance
, playing football
help
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helps
show examples
players to engage in a team and learn to work together
instead
of being selfish and isolated.
Sports
plays
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play
show examples
fundamental
Add an article
a fundamental
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role
for
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in
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all aspects of life.
To conclude
, a
well round-approach
Correct your spelling
well-rounded approach
show examples
that includes both academic support and physical activities can lead to more comprehensive growth of a child. A good balance between the two opinions can lead to
well mind
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well-mannered
show examples
offspring in the future.
Submitted by monahhj123 on

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Task Achievement
To enhance Task Achievement, ensure your response fully addresses all parts of the task. Your essay should present a balanced discussion of both views and a clear personal opinion. Integrating some specific, relevant examples from your knowledge or experience to support your points will also strengthen your essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
In terms of Coherence and Cohesion, consider organizing your essay more logically by clearly distinguishing paragraphs, each dedicated to a specific point. Using a range of linking words effectively will also help in achieving a better flow of ideas throughout your essay. Furthermore, consistency in verb tense and a more varied sentence structure can improve readability and coherence.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • holistic development
  • academic tasks
  • educational achievement
  • instills discipline
  • tailored support
  • learning difficulties
  • fosters physical health
  • encourages teamwork
  • builds resilience
  • stress relief
  • emotional and psychological well-being
  • well-rounded approach
  • comprehensive growth
  • nurturing
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