IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3.5

Large companies should pay higher salaries to CEOs and executives compared to other workers. To what extent do you agree or disagree? (Agree or Disagree)

#companies #salaries #ceos #executives #workers
In
this
 competitive era, most
bussiness
Correct your spelling
businesses
business
 are run by executives.
Therefore
, the salary of
seniors
 should be
paid
Verb problem
apply
show examples
higher than their employees. I am in complete accord with the given ideology, and the reasons for my opinion will be elucidated in the forthcoming paragraphs.
To begin
 with, the
seniors
 are people with extensive experience in
bussiness
Correct your spelling
business
as well as
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
life. They have to carry the whole burden of the industry on their shoulders. To explain,because of
their
Change the pronoun
the
show examples
 experiences they have, they ought to
dealing
Change the verb
deal
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 with the problems in their industry that lower-level employees can not.
For example
, if their
bussiness
Correct your spelling
business
 accountant miscalculates a small amount, they can correct it themselves. But if they make a lot of
miscalculation
Fix the agreement mistake
miscalculations
show examples
 that affect other departments,
seniors
Fix the agreement mistake
senior
show examples
excutive
Correct your spelling
executives
 will have to step in and solve the problem.
In addition
 to
this
,
seniors
 are people who have broad vision and profound knowledge . To become excellent like today, they
also
 need to spend not only money but
also
 their time.
Therefore
, paying them
high
Correct article usage
a high
show examples
 salary is completely worth it.
This
show
Correct subject-verb agreement
shows
show examples
on
Change preposition
that
show examples
 their experiences and results are properly awarded
To conclude
 ,
owning
Correct your spelling
owing
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 to reasons
such
 as
theirs
Correct the word
their
show examples
 experience, awards and good vision. I totally agree with paying
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
seniors
 or
executive
Fix the agreement mistake
executives
show examples
 higher salaries than regular employees
Submitted by nhuquynhbn2004 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that your introduction briefly outlines the reasons for your stance. This helps set a clear direction for your essay.
coherence cohesion
Using paragraphs to clearly separate your main ideas can help enhance the logical structure of your essay. Each paragraph should start with a topic sentence that introduces the main idea of that paragraph.
task achievement
To improve your Task Response score, make sure every part of the question is addressed. Though you clearly stated your opinion, expanding more on why alternative perspectives might be less valid could enrich your argument.
task achievement
Incorporate a wider range of vocabulary to articulate your ideas more clearly and precisely. This will also make your essay more engaging to the reader.
task achievement
Try providing real-life examples to support your arguments. This not only makes your essay more persuasive but also shows your ability to apply your argument to real-world situations.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • executive compensation
  • income disparity
  • corporate governance
  • incentive structures
  • ethical considerations
  • competitive advantage
  • demotivation
  • pay structures
  • social inequality
  • talent acquisition
  • company culture
  • economic impact
  • leadership roles
  • employee morale
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