It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

Taking
risks
is vital for individual lives professional or personal . Personally, the benefits of taking a chance outweigh the drawbacks because we can learn and know about the result of the
opportunity
that we have decided.
This
essay will discuss
this
case. On one hand, the benefit
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
taking
risks
is the huge
opportunity
to be successful.
People
who try to step forward are
easily
Replace the adverb
easy
show examples
to be a success person in the future because they do not allow themselves to stand in the same place.
For instance
, smart
people
who have good academics are scared to take a chance
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
student
exchange
and will never be an
exchange
student
in the future.
However
, students who have a standard academic but have a strong motivation to take
risks
by joining the
student
exchange
will have the
opportunity
to be a candidate for
student
exchange
.
On the other hand
, the
people
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
decide to take a risk in their life will be a person who has a
lot
of experience.
People
who have a
lot
of experience become wise
people
because they are learning about failing or success in
Correct article usage
the decisions
show examples
decisions
Correct article usage
the decisions
show examples
that they make.
For instance
, athlete as
proffesional
Correct your spelling
professional
professionals
should improve their ability and decide to always try many
competition
Fix the agreement mistake
competitions
show examples
to make
a
Change the article
an
show examples
opportunity
to be a champion.
This
journey
makes
Verb problem
gives
show examples
them a
lot
of experience between failure and
sucsessful
Correct your spelling
successful
. In conclusion, there are many benefits of taking a chance
outweigh
Correct pronoun usage
that outweigh
show examples
the drawbacks whether in personal or professional lives.
People
have a
lot
of experiences and opportunities to be successful in the future if they want to take
risks
in their lives.
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Task Achievement
Develop a clear thesis statement in your introduction to establish your viewpoint more clearly. This will help guide your essay and inform the reader of your stance on the issue.
Coherence & Cohesion
Providing clearer topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph will help better signpost your main points, making your argument more coherent.
Coherence & Cohesion
Use a wider range of linking words and phrases to enhance the flow between sentences and paragraphs. This will improve the overall cohesion of your essay.
Task Achievement
To strengthen your argument, include a wider variety of examples and evidence. Consider using personal anecdotes, statistics, or citing credible sources where relevant.
Task Achievement
Pay attention to grammar and spelling to ensure your essay is as clear and accurate as possible. Consider reviewing subject-verb agreement, verb tenses, and the use of articles.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Opportunities
  • Growth
  • Innovation
  • Challenges
  • Self-discovery
  • Resilience
  • Uncertainty
  • Consequences
  • Calculated risks
  • Stagnation
  • Regret
  • Comfort zone
  • Entrepreneurship
  • Adventurous spirit
  • Thriving
  • Failure
  • Mitigate
  • Reap the rewards
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